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| Sat, 04-22-2006 - 6:04pm |
Ok so I met this great guy last week and The first night we met we messed around. Second time I saw him we watched a movie, had dinner and messed around. Saw him a week later and we had our first date and slept together. Afterwards I told him I was NOT the type of girl but, It just happend. He said that I worry too much and that if he didn't like me then he wouldn't be with me. So now that I think that I gave into too easily, he might lose interest really quick and lose contact. He's a really great guy though. After that night he called me the next day and we were both very confortable talking to each other. Could I have blown it or do you think that there is still a chance?

My boyfriend and I slept together on our first date, on our second date, on our third date he stayed overnight at my place. We were comfortable with each other from the very beginning because we both knew what we were getting into, basically, there was no coyness or hot/cold. I had never been that way with anyone previous to that, normally I would wait until about two months into something if not more before getting physical in a relationship. I was not "that type of girl" with anyone except him, but we clicked well, so that ultimately didn't matter. ;) We're going on nine months together and things are sweetly amazing :)
I feel sex is too early only if you're uncomfortable with what you're doing or you don't feel in control of your decisions, your environment. To be honest, we had a discussion very early on about it being a sex-based relationship and the fact that neither of us wanted that. So we took a little break from sex and just dated to see if we enjoyed each other's company without it and I'm very glad to say we really did. That was a big turning point in the relationship, and we became completely exclusive in every way right around then. Yeah, we did everything backwards, but oh well.
In a nutshell, do what works for you and feels right, safe, and comfortable.
Best,
~Sandra
He did call the next day so that's a good sign. Are you seeing him again? Just don't have it become a purely sexual relationship - you need movies and dinners and hikes and communication and sharing to really build something.