Birthday disappointment
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Birthday disappointment
| Fri, 12-29-2006 - 10:59pm |
Just wanted to hear some opinions on this....first a little background...my boyfriend and I have been dating for a little less than a year. Both of us are divorced and we each have a daughter from our previous marriages who get along really great. We have been seriously talking about a future together but are both equally cautious so as not to duplicate the mistakes of the past. Since it is Christmas break, we have been spending a lot of time together with our kids and having sleepovers to see what it would be like if we were to actually take our relationship to the next level. Anyway, my birthday was yesterday. I've never really gotten too excited about my birthday because it is right smack in the middle of the holidays and often times gets fogotten or just becomes part of the holiday gift giving (you know..this is your christmas/ birthday present kind of stuff). So, we went out to dinner with my mom, my daughter, him and his daughter. He didn't have a card or a birthday present for me and I felt a little bad about it. He told me he didn't have a chance to get me a card because we had been together the entire time from Christmas up until my birthday with the exception of a few hours when he had to take his father to the airport. I felt really bad about it but just tried to brush it off and told him I was just happy he came to dinner with me and I'd rather have him than a card any day and I really do mean that. But, the more I think about it, the more I feel bad about it. He could have easily saved one or two of my christmas presents and given them to me on my birthday. This really just reinforces why I really don't get excited about my birthday. Its just dissapointing that so many people get so excited about their birthday and I never really feel like I can...people are just too partied out! I know he loves me and probably felt really bad about it. And, just to show he is not a complete jerk like it may now seem, he has surprised me with some really nice things on other occasions such as mother's day when I least expected it. I just don't know if I should say something or just let it go. And, if i say something, how do I do it w/o sounding like a bitch? Opinions please...trying to figure out how to handle this.

Well I'm always of the opinion that if something is bothering you than you should say something. I understand that you are disappointed and of course he could have saved one of your presents and wrapped it up and said it was for your birthday. But christmastime is so busy, people just don't think like that. You have a one track mind at that time of year, getting all your christmas shopping done. I would cut him a bit of slack on this one and hope he does better next year. I never get excited about my birthday. I graduated from college on my 30th birthday I was SOOOOOOOOOOO excited, I mean who does that, gets to walk down the aisle at graduation on their 30th birthday as well and it was with little fanfare. I was kind of expecting a big party after and nothing I went out to dinner with my parents went home and was like "that's it?" it was just kind of flat feeling. I was with someone for 6 years that could never remember my birthday and it's in May nowhere near the holidays but I never got mad because he's just an airhead when it comes to dates and he would get me things here and there so it never really bothered me, the first two years it did though but after I was like "your a dork" and just blew it off.
Hugs I know you are hurt. I think there is a genetic gene somewhere missing for men when it comes to dates on the calendar. LOL
Smile,
Deirdre
I would say it to him just as you said it here. You didn't sound bitchy at all. Just explain it like you did to us. Unless he purposely ingnored your birthday just to hurt you, which does not seem to be the case, just tell him how you feel.
Good luck and happy birthday!
YG
YG
http://twodatediva.blogspot.com/
It's understandable it upset you and you should voice it in not an offensive way or to make him feel bad but in that you know it's important to communicate and because he is such a great guy you just want him to know this was important to you and that he didnt get the card did upset you a little.