Wondering if he cares

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2004
Wondering if he cares
10
Tue, 09-04-2007 - 8:53am
I met him on a cruise ship. He's a member of a band that plays in one of the lounges. I've seen him 3 times on cruises and we became friendly. On my last trip I gave him a scrape book about their band that I had found on the internet. He was quite pleased and surprised. We already had exchanged phone numbers and he told me he would call me. I didn't think anything about it and the very next day when I got home he called. I happened to be at work and then he called me back on the weekend. He wanted to know if we could get together for lunch in the city and I told him no at first and then changed my mind. I guess I was nervous. So we met up and had a great time. He insisted on walking back to the train station with me. On the way back he told me that "he thinks about me all the time"; all I could say was "you do" and at this point I took his hand but couldn't say anything. I was afraid I'd say too much. It seemed to me that things were starting to change between us and I was hoping he was interested in me. The first train station I saw I said goodbye and he told me he would call. I said that I would like to say goodbye to him before he goes home. So now I'm anxiously waiting to see if he would or not. But my question is why say something like "I think about you all the time" Doesn't that mean he cares about me??? I really was surprised at that. He only has 2 more trips back. Also he gave me his home telephone number in the Phillipines and told me that I can call him. Just need your advice about this one. Thanks
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-14-2006
Tue, 09-04-2007 - 7:16pm

Just because he thinks about you all the time, doesn't mean that he loves you, it only means that he is attracted to you. He doesn't know you well enough to know if he loves you.

since he lives in the Phillipines, why would you want to get involved romantically with him? How could you date him on a regular schedule?

You are infatuated with him now, but he might be a good friend. It's up to you whether or not you want to have a long distant relationship.

Since he travels, you might be very lonely waiting for him to take you out. good luck

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2004
Tue, 09-04-2007 - 8:42pm
Hi britstarlite and thanks for your reply. I do feel that he is attracted to me and your right about becoming involved romatically considering he lives in the Phillipines. But I think I just want to establish a good friend relationship with him. And not be afraid to cruise with them again. If by chance he doesn't get back to me by the end of the year could I still cruise with them again? Or would it not be wise thing to do. We left on friendly terms. I hate this dating and waiting game. Whether will he call or won't he. It doesn't even have to be a date. I told him to call so I can say goodbye. I just want it to be normal with him. Thanks again MaryAnn
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2004
Wed, 09-05-2007 - 9:32am

Of course you could still cruise with them; why couldn't you?


Given the logistics of the situation, I would view this as a harmless (but ego-boosting) flirtation. If it ever develops into more than that, great, but I wouldn't expect it to.


If he doesn't contact you again before

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2004
Wed, 09-05-2007 - 9:56am
Hi inveranalyze, that's what I needed to hear. And it certainly is a great ego boosting that he could be infatuated with me. What a very wonderful feeling it is too.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-08-2007
Sat, 09-08-2007 - 4:46am

Why are you on the internet and not dialing right now.

Call him.

Like right now.

:)

Cristina

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2004
Sat, 09-08-2007 - 12:55pm
Hi supertina82, loved you answer but I can't call him on the ship. I have one more week to hear from him before he goes back home. I really hope he calls. Especially since he's suppose to think about me all the time. Wouldn't you think so??? If not, he gave me his home number in the PHillipines so I guess I'll surprise him with a call. Again, even though he didn't say so I think we got together because of the scrape book and he probably wanted to thank me in person. Could I be right or does he have a crush on me?? Thanks for your reply. That would be awesome if he did. I'm pretty lousy at this dating game and what to say. But I did take his hand. So he has to know that I care to. I just wish I could have asked him what he meant by that statement. If I talk him again, can I bring that up and ask him??? What do you think? Mary Ann
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2003
Sat, 09-08-2007 - 2:30pm
Yes it sounds like he thinks about you but he does live in the Phillipines, that doesn't auger well for a serious relationship at this point but sure it sounds like its ok if you call him
,
,
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-08-2007
Sun, 09-09-2007 - 1:29am

Call him when he gets home and ask him to tell you all about his trip, then you can tell him about your week. DON'T ask him what he meant by that statement. He said it once, I'm sure he's expecting it to have sunk in. :)

Tell him you miss him. Just keep the communication going!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2004
Sun, 09-09-2007 - 12:12pm
Thanks supertina82, I think I'll do just that. I have been telling him I wouldn't be calling him at home because that's his territory. But each time I told him that I still have his number he told me that I could call him at home and seemed a little upset that I told him that I wouldn't do that; but now I'm reconsidering and I do want to surprise him. I'm still hoping for a call sometime this week before he goes home on the 16th of September. I'm keeping my figures crossed. Thanks again. Mary Ann
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2004
Tue, 12-18-2007 - 9:35am

This is an update - still haven't heard a word from him.