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| Tue, 12-18-2007 - 1:32am |
Hi everyone!
I just have a few questions about dating and guys and such. First of all, I'm kind of a beginner when it comes to the dating scene. I had some sexual abuse issues I had to work on from childhood that really held me away from dating guys when in my teens. I've only been out on one real date and haven't ever had a serious boyfriend. Plus, I was stuck on the idea of someone for 6 years b/c of the aforementioned problems to "protect" myself. This past year I went to counseling and have practically rehabilitated myself. I just recently graduated from college and am just starting a new life. I am feeling so positive about everything in my life right now that certain things that should get me down don't.
To begin, I met someone a year and a half ago in one of my classes who I really clicked with. Only problem was that at the time I was just not ready for any type of closeness yet. I still hadn't worked through my problems and I was stuck on this guy who I thought I was in love with from high school.
The guy I met in college his name is Michael and we were both attracted to each other and we'd make each other laugh. And we'd talk about anything. I remember sometimes sitting next to him and feeling so content inside. But then my insecurities started to come through and I started pushing him away. He started trying to get closer to me, but I held up a wall and that's where that ended.
This past summer I had been putting my past behind me and was getting closure on the boy from high school b/c we had a very straightforward talk about everything. I had received a notification through AIM that Michael had been looking for me on there, but I couldn't figure out how to contact him back. I had his school e-mail address so I e-mailed him and he contacted me a month later asking me how I was doing and if I had graduated and that he was doing kind of bad and he really wanted to talk to me. I e-mailed him once responding to his questions and then another time b/c I hadn't heard from him after a month. In the second one I was more straightforward and told him how I had felt back then and gave him my number. That was almost three months ago and I have yet to hear from him.
When we had that class together, we had a group project together with 3 other people and he would never check his e-mail. I understood at first why he was taking so long to answer me back b/c of what he used to do, but now it's been three months and I'm just thinking he's not interested. Mainly b/c through our school, you can see who is online when taking tests or checking class information through a special forum they have. I've seen him on there many times and I just figure he doesn't want to talk to me anymore.
So, what do you guys think??
Second of all, b/c the one I really wanted isn't showing interest I've been looking elsewhere. This past semester I interned for a local newspaper and met a lot of cool people. From the beginning, there has been this guy who stares at me like every time I'm around. He's in a different department so we really don't have a whole lot of area to interact with one another. Of course b/c the office waterhole is the kitchen we have run into each other in there. He of course starts doing the staring thing but when I look at him to say hi or whatever he looks away and practically hides himself.
I'll give a few incidents as an example. I'm still helping them out up there until they get the new interns for the spring so I come in a few times a week. Today I came in for a few hours and was leaving when I saw him walking toward me. He was texting someone so I kept walking. Then he looked up and started staring at me so I thought this would be a good chance to say hi so when I was about to he got on his phone.
Then another time, I had gone into the kitchen to get something out of the first aid kit when I felt someone in there with me getting water. I put everything back and began walking out when I realize he's standing behind me checking me out and when I look at him he looks away and tries to hide his face.
It was kinda cute and caught my interest at first but now it's just getting annoying. I don't know if he just is attracted to me or if he's just really shy or he's just one of those guys who stares without thinking?? Need advice on that one.
And last but not least, I just recently started trying to get a seasonal job at Target and have just been getting the run around there. But this past Friday I actually went in for orientation and was in a class with three other guys and a girl. Two of the guys were flirting with me the whole time but only one of them really sparked my interest.
At the end of the day, the managers up there had still not figured out what position I would have. I had first been hired on in the photo lab but after being hired I didn't hear from them after 3 weeks except for when I called to see what was going on. Finally they called me and told me the photo lab was filled and that I would be a cashier. Well, I just recently graduated with journalism but am continuing on in school to get my BFA in photography so I wanted to have different types of experience. When I went in for orientation the two guys that were talking to me the whole time had been hired after me. And the one who had sparked my interest had been hired for the photo lab. When I told them what happened, he started apologizing b/c he felt bad for taking my job. Then when we were leaving he said I could come hang out with him in photo lab and that we could print pictures and stuff together.
During orientation, the lady told us we could date co-workers, but we couldn't date anyone in a higher rank than us. So my main question here and the previous issue could fall in this part too, is it difficult to date people who you work with?? What have been your experiences with that??
And I believe that is it for the night with dating questions. I hope it's not a jumbled read and thanks to anyone in advance who gives me advice!
Steph

Congratulations on all accomplishing all that you have set out to do thus far.
When it comes to men it is best to be open to meeting new people and to let
Thanks for responding!
I am trying to keep my options open that's why I'm keeping my eyes open to see what else is out there. I'm starting to think the guy at the newspaper isn't anything worth considering though. It's just kind of lame and I've never had a convo with him.
And it makes me sad about Michael b/c of the chemistry we did have together. It has been over a year since we saw each other last and I guess the fact that he found me through AIM made me have some hope that all was not lost there. I felt kind of bad because I had pushed him away. My brother thinks that maybe b/c of what happened before he may just be guarding himself or something. I don't know. I doubt he'd be trying to play mindgames with me though b/c he isn't like that.
But I'd totally understand about work stuff going sour and it being uncomfortable. I really wouldn't want that at all to happen.