Why Do I Psych Myself Out?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2006
Why Do I Psych Myself Out?
4
Thu, 12-20-2007 - 2:07pm

Okay, so I started seeing this awesome guy for a few weeks now, and he's been nothing but honest and great to me. We go out on formal dates, go watch football, and has even cooked for me one morning. We engage ourselves in thought provoking conversations; he's honest and sincere. All in all, a guy that I would one day want to establish a relationship with.


The biggest obstacle I have with myself when it comes to dating guys, is whenever things are going great with someone, I have a nagging tendance to second question his feelings for me, and it just goes down hill from there. Unless he's calling me, or with me, or

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-10-2007
Thu, 12-20-2007 - 3:23pm

One way you can squelch those negative thoughts is by reminding yourself of the positive things you have experienced with him thus far.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-1999
Thu, 12-20-2007 - 5:08pm

your need for reassurance is your insecurity talking. And the reason many women get insecure is because they are focused on 'does he like me' rather than "is he someone that I like and has the qualities I want in a partner?"


One puts you at the mercy of others tastes

Toni

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2006
Thu, 12-20-2007 - 6:36pm

I sincerely appreciate both of your honesty and advise.


The reasons behind my insecurities is the bad relationships I've had in the past. I can go on and on about everything that's happened to me, but I feel that when it comes to being with someone new, then that should be irrelevant.


I haven't gone to the depths of calling in on a continuous basis, but we do hang out and see how sweet he is to me, I should be ecstatic that someone is this crazy about me. I just wished that I didn't feel this bummed out about the continued reassurance.


Time for me to keep myself busy; once again, thank you all so much :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2003
Sat, 12-22-2007 - 6:09pm

Obviously this is about your insecurities and self esteem issues, it's not about him.

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