Move with him out of state??

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2006
Move with him out of state??
9
Wed, 12-26-2007 - 8:41pm
I have been on the east coast all my life. I have a great job, friends, and family close by. But the man
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-08-2006
Thu, 12-27-2007 - 11:29am
Wow, that is a tough one. What about a compromise? Say for example, you stay behind on the East coast for a bit until you guys have been dating for at least a year( or however long you choose). That gives you 4 months of an LDR, but it could give you time to decide if this is really what you want. Compatibility is also about two people moving in the same direction literally and figuratively. If you guys are still going strong, you could looking into moving once you have been together for your determined amount of time.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-10-2007
Thu, 12-27-2007 - 1:05pm

This is a tough one for sure.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-23-2005
Thu, 12-27-2007 - 1:07pm

don't do it!! its only 8 months, not long enough for such a drastic change.


I did this silly mistake, moving about 200 miles from home, and now am moving back, house


up for sale...............I regretted it, it wasn't what I thought, and now want to go back to


family & friends.


iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2006
Fri, 12-28-2007 - 2:27pm

Thanks to all of you for the great advice. I agree... he really threw a wrench in on this one. To put a little more detail in the mix, he is a firefighter, and has to take their agility test in March or April. So there is a chance he wont make it, but his chances are good, and this is his dream. So that does give us a

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2003
Fri, 12-28-2007 - 5:55pm

You've known him for 8 months....so what do you know about him? His name and family? Work and hobbies? Line of work? But do you know HIM really? Are you compatible with regard to standards in life? Do you have similar positions regarding religion, raising kids, viewing the future?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2006
Fri, 12-28-2007 - 11:14pm

I agree with you, you bring up all great and valid points. So that everyone knows a little more about the situation, maybe some facts would help:


As far as our relationship: I know his family and he knows mine well. He is a firefighter and a successful real estate agent. He would be sacrificing just as much as I would in a lot of ways. Our standards in life, religious beliefs, raising kids and viewing the future are all very much the same. I do see myself with him in five years and more. I am extremely sensitive to red flags as I my last relationship (2 yrs before I met my current bf) was abusive and a nightmare, and

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2007
Sun, 12-30-2007 - 11:15am

After reading your last post, I say do it.. go, it will be an adventure for you both, your family and friends will be there for you should things not go right.

v

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2003
Mon, 12-31-2007 - 4:44pm
can you try it long distance a while before making the leap.
,
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-22-2007
Tue, 01-01-2008 - 11:42am

He made this choice of taking a job across the country without your input.