The Holidays are coming

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-11-2005
The Holidays are coming
9
Fri, 10-13-2006 - 6:10pm

So with our US Thanksgiving coming & Christmas/New Year coming~~what are your plans going to be involing the IL's?

For Thanksgiving, we will going to BIL's down in OR (as I broke my wrist/tore tendons 5 weeks ago, I won't be able to do any cooking even by then--they told me 8 to 12 weeks, so I got off easy & I won't be making any dessert for them either) dh & I will be staying at a hotel & I'm incharge of the car keys.

I'm sure Christmas will come up tomorrow when MIL comes here for dh's bd~~we usually do a dinner with her the weekend before so she can go to BIL's to be with he & his 2 dd's. Then we will do something with my oldest dd,sil & gd on Christmas eve. News Year will be just the two of us or we will be babysitting my gd.

So what are your plans?

Sam

~~Sam stitches well with others, runs with scissors in her pocket. Cheerful and stupid.
Avatar for seekingpeace2002
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Registered: 04-27-2003
Fri, 10-13-2006 - 11:24pm

My husband and I were just talking about the holidays yesterday. My fil and step mil (especially step mil) will want us to go to their house for Thanksgiving. The Thanksgiving after they were married, they came to my house for dinner. My step mil wanted to plan the menu with me and that part was agreeable then she asked me how I cooked the turkey. I told her I used salt, pepper, poultry seasoning, butter and garlic powder. She said oh no, that's not how you cook it. Too much fat, and no garlic. She bought the turkey and I was to make it her way, which I did and it tasted like hospital food! So the next time I made it my way which my husband and I liked and she didn't say anything. Now, since her son moved here, she has to have dinner at her house...I have even invited them over for Labor Day and she said no, come over to their house.

My dilemma this year is...There are 3 pro football games on Thanksgiving Day. I don't enjoy the visiting because I can never get a word in edge-wise with her and I especially don't want to visit during the football games!! My husband and I came up with a couple of options...my idea was to have dinner out at a nice restaurant (we'd buy our own), then we could sit and she can talk my ear off for that couple of hours, then we go home. I'd only miss a part of a game (if timed right) and then I'd be home for the rest. My husband said she wouldn't go for that. My other idea was to have dinner at our house (yes, I'd have to cook but I wouldn't mind so much because I could see the games while I'm cooking). They would come...yes, ever her son could come...we'd sit and visit for a spell, we'd eat and then I would go into my room (home office and craft room) and turn the game on and actually be able to hear it without people talking. My fear is they won't want to come to dinner here even if her son was invited. My husband said if they don't want to come on Thankgiving, that's ok...we'd have dinner here by ourselves and then go to their house on Friday for dinner. That ain't going to fly either...the in-laws/outlaws weren't happy with me because I want to barbeque on Sunday instead of Monday for Labor Day...They won't want to celebrate Thanksgiving on Friday instead of Thursday. So we've reached an impasse...The other option is I just get over seeing football on Thursday, grow up and suck it in...speaking of sucking, it would suck. I work hard and pay all of the bills, buy groceries and all that stuff. I don't ask for much just that I get to see my football games. Oh my, I sound like a man...an old-fashioned man at that...

SP2002

Avatar for cl_mugalug
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Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 10-14-2006 - 12:41pm
Personally, I think that you should cook dinner at your house. That way you know the food will taste good, and you get to watch your games. Its your holiday too. You shouldn't have to sacrifice your holidays every year because that is what MIL wants. Who cares what she wants. Its not about her.

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Avatar for cl_mugalug
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Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 10-14-2006 - 12:45pm
As for us, we will be having Thanksgiving with just us, as well as Christmas. Since Dh got a new job he can't take any time off yet. I mean he can, but not as much time as we would need to go home for Christmas. Last year we were there for about a week.

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Registered: 03-19-2003
Sun, 10-15-2006 - 10:42pm
For Thanksgiving, my DH and I plan on having a few people over. Ditto for Christmas. We do not want to see his one sister and we do not want to see my sister due to events that transpired this year. We will not be going to either family's house and we will be having the holidays at our house this year.

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Registered: 10-04-2005
Mon, 10-16-2006 - 10:08am

Thanksgiving - the ILs get nothing. They never did anything together for T anyway. Only DH and I would invite his M, S and her 3Ds b/c both are divorced and had no one else. Now, with the way they've treated me in the last 2 years - it'll be a cold day in hell before I invited them to my house for a holiday. (They didn't speak to me for my DD's 1st birthday party at our house.)

Xmas eve - we'll have to do something with all of them. They have their "family Xmas" on the Eve, so they all get together and act like they're not dysfunctional. But, with DD napping in the afternoon and DH really strict about not messing with nap and bedtimes to keep her relatively scheduled, we won't have to spend much time there anyway. Thank God!

Xmas day - Nothing with them.

I've lost all tolerance for them. Wait until they hear I'm pregnant again... Hee hee hee...

- J

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Registered: 05-05-2004
Wed, 10-18-2006 - 9:24am

Thanksgiving is DH's this year, but I won't find out what house or when (I know it's all in NY, about six hours traveling with a toddler), until the VERY last minute, like two days before travel day. My DH is nuts, he wants to travel six hours one way on Thanksgiving Day, and then expect my DD to be all nice and huggy with his family, it's not going to happen that way I told him but he doesn't believe me.


Christmas eve is with his folks too, oh joy. Another trip. I think that's more assumed we will spend Fri and Sat then come home on Sunday. Christmas Day is at MY NEW HOUSE! I am so happy to start a new tradition! My family is coming to my house for Christmas Day dinner, and I am so excited. It will be the first time my DD really understands Santa.


So, get thru the crap to get to the good stuff!


Liz

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Registered: 10-04-2006
Wed, 10-18-2006 - 10:34am
hmmmmf.....well, it doesn't matter to me what anyone else around here does, I will definitely be cooking and celebrating Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years, and every other holiday right here at home. Since we all pretty much live within a 1/2 mile of each other my children and hubby can go visit all their little hearts desire...my A$$ will be staying home, and my family will be coming over here. We used to all get together at MIL's but no more for me. I am not putting myself in that let-down situation ever again!! SOOOO, I am predicting wonderful holidays in my future, plus I love to cook up a storm for the holidays and perhaps I will really go OVERBOARD this year!! lololol
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Registered: 02-16-2006
Wed, 10-18-2006 - 10:54am
It won't even feel like the holidays cause DH2B's one sister and her family are always up every other weekend staying at our house any way. Thanksgiving and christmas are usually at his mom and dad's, thank god. I refuse to have it at my house b/c i will have 2 SIL's messing up my kitchen and one of them thinking she is the boss of it all when I am making the meal and have everything under control. Plus, dinner will be an hour later than what they said. Those two talk to much and don't do what they need to be doing. Sorry I'm kind of in a bad mood right now with the one SIL so my out look is not very good. I look more forward to going to the holidays on my mom's side of the family.
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Registered: 06-23-2006
Thu, 10-19-2006 - 1:26pm

If we just ignore Thanksgiving and don't tell anyone what our plans are do you think they will notice?????

L