FURIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!
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FURIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!
| Mon, 01-22-2007 - 11:24pm |
So I recieve a phone call from my mom today saying she recieved an invitation from US inviting them to my FIL's retirement party on FEB 3rd. I said what! US what do you mean from US. She said she got an invitation that reads something like (I haven't seen the invitation) come celebrate with us FIL's 35 years retirement party date, time, and place(it's being held at in-laws home).
Then it says Hosted by MIL, my DH, myself, our two daughters(one being 5yrs old and the other 17 months), SIL, and her BoyF.
Now I recall my DH speaking with my MIL the other day on the phone infront of me, telling him about the party asking if FEB 3rd would be a good day for us and if not let her know, for us to bring a finger food, and making the comment "I want you guys involved". But yet we were never asked if we'd like to help HOST or plan the party or not once have we been notified that all of our names were going to be on the invitation! Matter of fact we have no idea what the invitation looks like.
DH even had asked MIL well who's invited MIL responds I don't know FIL still has the invite list.
We're so peed right now b/c I and DH had no idea we were CO-HOSTING THE PARTY!!! And I was confused when my mom said Hey We got your invitation it was kinda embarressing. DH's upset b/c MIL included SIL's BF who's only been involved for about a year and SIL and BF aren't married and live together which is fine with me but IN-laws are all for it when they made a huge deal to me about living unwed with my DH.
Anyway... What should we do? What's your oppinion?
Then it says Hosted by MIL, my DH, myself, our two daughters(one being 5yrs old and the other 17 months), SIL, and her BoyF.
Now I recall my DH speaking with my MIL the other day on the phone infront of me, telling him about the party asking if FEB 3rd would be a good day for us and if not let her know, for us to bring a finger food, and making the comment "I want you guys involved". But yet we were never asked if we'd like to help HOST or plan the party or not once have we been notified that all of our names were going to be on the invitation! Matter of fact we have no idea what the invitation looks like.
DH even had asked MIL well who's invited MIL responds I don't know FIL still has the invite list.
We're so peed right now b/c I and DH had no idea we were CO-HOSTING THE PARTY!!! And I was confused when my mom said Hey We got your invitation it was kinda embarressing. DH's upset b/c MIL included SIL's BF who's only been involved for about a year and SIL and BF aren't married and live together which is fine with me but IN-laws are all for it when they made a huge deal to me about living unwed with my DH.
Anyway... What should we do? What's your oppinion?

I don't know... I really don't think it's that big of a deal. She could have told you that your names were on the invite as a hostess but she did ask you to be involved. I guess what I am thinking is that she just wants it to be a special day for her dh and showing that her family is all involved give a nice feeling on an invitation and probably made her feel proud.
What will you really need to do other than mingle, bring a dish or two and appear supportive? That's about all a co-host would do.
JMHO
Do you not like your in-laws? Is that why you are upset?
I agree, it doesn't really look like anything to get furious about. It's a nice gesture, show solidarity and generosity from the whole family. Maybe she could have checked with you that you were ok with it, but it sounds like it was done with good, rather than bad intentions. If anyone tries to involve you in a way you are uncomfortable with, just direct them to your MIL and say she's the one really doing all the work. Show up, ask MIL what dish to bring, and take all the compliments for her hard work in preparing the party :-)
Seriously, unless there is some bigger thing going on that you are mad about, this doesn't sound like it's worth getting cross about. Does it appear overly presumptive and controlling to you because she's behaved that way in the past and that has annoyed you? It might help to disentangle that from this present scenario.
Kirsty