Played a message to my co-worker

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2004
Played a message to my co-worker
2
Fri, 03-05-2004 - 10:34am
Hey Everyone,

I have an old message that I play to myself every now and then, it is the nasty message he left about the information I mailed to him. I played the message to for a co-worker and she was amazed at his behavior, she made me feel so good. She said, your better than that. He is so angry inside. He said that I like to be the most affected by the problems we have. He is always trying to down play my feelings which I think is totally unfair. Well anytime that I start forgetting how inconsiderate he can be, I play this message and it snaps me to reality. Hope this may help someone out. It is working for me. LOL, have a great weekend.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-10-2003
Fri, 03-05-2004 - 10:48am
This is a very smart idea to use when the old demons start creeping up on us. I myself always go back and read passages in my jounral, especially the really painful ones and it completely obliterates any of those sappy emotions i may encounter. Good thinking!

I too also find that when others agree or are shocked by their behaviour it validates us. As I talk to others at the Shelter (I ams taying there for now) I realize that he has done horrible things, we tend tolive in a bubble with no other frame of reference to guide us in judging their behaviour. When I started working I realized thatI needed to edit my weekend stories when everyone was chatting on Monday because my stories were not so good oncce I understood how others spent their free time, so I would either leave him out all together or just lie.

You keep that message (and anyothers youmay get) and use it against him to buid up your stregnth when you need it. I think of him pawning my engangement ring or the day he stabbed his plate with a fork and thelook on his face made dd5 scream infear and hide behind me.

Good luck to you and stay strong.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-31-2003
Fri, 03-05-2004 - 1:44pm
Shortly after I had my ex arrested, he called me on christmas morning and verbally assaulted me on the phone for about an hour. I held a hand-held recorder to the phone. Every time I thought about him, I listened to it.

It totally worked.

I also had a journal that I read every once in a while..even still after I've been free for 16 months and am in a new relationship. I even got the guts to share some of my journal entries with my new SO, and he made comments that made me feel a lot better as well.

good thinking girl!

Sarah