Troubled
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Troubled
| Fri, 03-19-2004 - 9:29am |
HI everyone! Well, okay I just want to say thank you to all of you for listening to me. Just think we dont know eachother but we have a lot in common. I cant talk to my coworkers nor my family--especially my sisters about all my troubles. Last night my best friend from college stayed with me over night and I took her to the airport this morning. She asked my boyfriend if she could take me out for a few drinks for my belated bday party while I was in the bathroom. When I came out he was on my cell phone talking to one of his friends talkin about, "Come pick me up and lets go get drunk..." I asked who he was talking to and why was he talking out of it. He said just leave, go drink. I stayed but my friend and me stayed up visiting until 11 or so. He sulked and stayed in the bedroom the whole time. So I told my girlfriend everything--everything. It was such a relief....i have an ounce of confidence back and know i can do better. I just need to ease out of this...I love him very much and feel so stupid for loving an abuser. For even typing that. Geez. He has bit me on my face, slammed me around, bruised my arms, legs, face, you name it. He has jumped out of my car on numerous occasions, damaged my car, every insane thing he has done it. Im lucky in that I have no kids. My clique from college all have kids and got divorced. They used to live vicariously through me now its vice versa. I just turned 26 and now Im living through them. I have to ask to go any place, scared he'll be mad or get mad. Last night my friend and me went to the store to get soda and when i returned he grabbed my phone and started checking it....Geez....I dont know where to begin theres so much more and this morning i got the guts to email my sister across the country. I emailed her everything--im scared more of her now though.

Red, I am so proud of you!
CL-Blueliner4