Where can HE get help?
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Where can HE get help?
| Wed, 11-10-2004 - 11:51pm |
My H and I had a long talk the other night. He did a lot of the predictable word twisting and throwing things back at me, blah blah blah, but he SAYS he wants to fix things, end the verbal abuse, quash the violence, all that jazz. He supposedly has a therapy appointment coming up soon, but I told him if he's really serious, he'll want to check into a program that focuses on abuse specifically.
Thing is, I can't even find such a program when I go looking for it. I see there's something called EMERGE in New York or Massachusetts or something, and a few court-ordered batterers' programs. But how can I find a local program? (I'm in Michigan.)
I'm not putting all my eggs in this basket, mind you. I know the likelihood of him overcoming this is slim to none. But it's odd that I can't find the answer to this. I find a million programs for the victim, but none for the abuser. Isn't that strange? Are there really no men out there wanting to fix their problem, and thus no demand for properly trained counselors? Maybe that's the case.
Or maybe there's a clear list somewhere and I've just failed to find it yet. Any help would be appreciated.
A

Wow, good question.
CL-Blueliner4
Wouldn't abuse hotlines and local resources have access to those kinds of therapists? Wouldn't therapists who works with the abused party also be trained to work with the abuser? If not, I'm betting they have the names and numbers of those who do.
Along with the suggestions Blueliner had, call your local state Adult and Family Services Divison. They have a list of programs/therapists that their clients are referred to. I can promise you a call to your local federal, state or county parole/probation department (every state has a different name, for some it's Dept. of Corrections, Adult Corrections, Feds would be U.S. Probation...)each one of those offices most likely has an officer who carries the domestic violence caseload. Ask to speak to that officer and you'll get the names and numbers of the counselors and programs he or she sends clients to. Don't be afraid to ask if they know of any other resources as well, likely, they only use one or two, whomever they currently have a contract with, you'll have to jog them to get them to think about other resources they're aware of but don't use.
~ cl-2nd_lifecl-2nd_
Mama Harmony
look for a counselor that specializes in behavioral disorders. DH and i were looking for counselors too. He did most of the calling and leg work but we found the same problem... not many specialize in abuse or anger management in our area, but from talking to a few counselors we learned that behavioral disorders fall under the category of anger management as well... bc usually anger is the underlying issue.
look for counselors that deal with abuse, domestic abuse or child abuse... call them and ask if they have any resources for programs you could look into.
=)
Good luck!
Hi...the court ordered programs are probably the only options and if there are more in your area, they
When someone shows you who they are, believe them.
- Maya Angelou
Thanks again for your help!
A
This is bad news, right off the bat.
CL-Blueliner4