Noticing Things

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-26-2004
Noticing Things
2
Sun, 12-12-2004 - 8:16am
I've posted before on this board about my ex husband and how was abusive to me. He is with this new woman and they are now engaged. He gave her the ring sometime within the past couple weeks and I noticed it on her finger. I was a little jealous when I saw it, since it is a lot nicer than the one he had bought me. I seemed to think they had the perfect relationship. But I am starting to see little things that lead me to believe he is just as controlling with her. I don't think it bothers her, yet. She makes little comments, like when she comes to pick up the kids from me, and I find out my ex will not be home til later in the evening. I ask her why she wants to pick up the kids from me when he is not even home and she says "he told me to come and get them." Last night the kids asked her why she put up the Christmas tree without them. She said, "I was told to put up the tree, so I did." She seems to be very submissive. It gives me a little satisfaction to know that she is his new "servant", doing whatever he tells her to.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2004
In reply to: jodyannrn
Sun, 12-12-2004 - 8:28am

Hi jodyann, good to see you again.

Mama Harmony

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-10-2003
In reply to: jodyannrn
Tue, 12-14-2004 - 2:27pm

Good call, Mama C! This reminded me of a story, and I had to come out of "lurk" mode to share it with y'all . . .

My Mom's ex-husband (my former stepfather) was an abusive jerk. I blame him for a lot of the f***ed up ideas I had about how a relationship should be, hence why I got involved with my abusive ex-husband. Anywho, when they got engaged, he gave my Mom a *beautiful* marquis-cut solitaire, which she absolutely loved. I think it was about one carat. Well, the stone fell out one day while she was at work. She must have had a loose prong or something, and her desk was on a tile floor at the time, so she heard it fall. So, she and about five of her coworkers spent almost an hour frantically searching for this "diamond." They finally found it, and my Mom took it to a jeweler to have it re-set into her ring. The jeweler took one look at it and said, "You do know this is a cubic zirconia, right?" My Mom played it off and said, "Yes, I knew, but it has a lot of sentimental value, so I'd like to have it re-set anyway." She never told her ex-husband that she had found out, until she filed for divorce about ten years later. When he found out she knew, he immediately went out and bought her a *real* diamond, which was even nicer. Way to try to buy her back, huh?!?! Well, my Mom was having none of it, told him where he could stick *both* rings, divorced his sorry a$$, and she is now happily married to a *great* guy. Goes to show you . . . that rock isn't always what it looks like! ;oP

~Emm