Well, he left.........

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2003
Well, he left.........
2
Fri, 12-31-2004 - 12:14am

.........again tonight. This makes it the 3rd time he has moved out in 3 months, and he said this time he is staying away.

He apologized for how mean he has been and said he is not happy.......

I am relieved yet saddened at the same time. I still love him and worry about him.

*sigh*

Thank you so much for the responses.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Fri, 12-31-2004 - 2:13am

Hi Gypsy -


Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if he tries to

CL-Blueliner4

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2003
Fri, 12-31-2004 - 12:50pm

Thanks blueliner,

I read your message really late last night, and was too tired to respond.... but it really made me think (o:

>>I'd also think about changing the locks (if you live in an apartment, contact your office/landlord, explain the situation and request new locks ASAP).

I asked him to give me his key last night before he left... which he did... but I wonder in the back of my mind if he may have a copy? I doubt it... I should explain what is going on to the apt managers though so that they don't give him a copy!

>>Feel sorry for him, worry about him, but realize that by doing that you are taking energy away from your healing, the person who is important here. You need to worry about you and your recovery

Totally true! It is going to be hard, but I have to realize it is normal and I have to take care of myself!

>>One of the best ways to focus on yourself is to maintain a policy of NO CONTACT.

This one is a toughy... he still will come by every couple weeks, because he is helping me out financially till I can get on my feet, and he will visit my son... my son is now 18 and they have known each other since he was only 4.... I guess that doesn't mean I can't leave when he is coming over.

>>An alternate, which I tried, is to make a list of things you like about him, and things you hate. Journaling is also helpful (it's been suggested to keep two - one for "incidences", one for personal feelings - the one where you really cut loose). Of course, posting here is also a great way to vent and is strongly encouraged.

That is a huge help... I put off journaling quite often, yet it is so relaxing when I stick with it. And posting here has been a help already (o:

>>Please consider getting some counseling.

I have an appointment scheduled (WOO HOO) for January 6th

>>celebrate yourself

Thanks for the reminder... that is something I have not done in a long time!

It is sooo hard not to dwell on it..... I had a nightmare last night )o:..... but I know, it will pass...

Thanks again (((HUGS))) Michelle