Is this really happening to me?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-11-2004
Is this really happening to me?
2
Sat, 01-01-2005 - 1:03am

Hi everyone,

As some of you have seen my earlier post, I am just coming to reality with the verbally/mental abuse that my husband as put me through for 5 years, I wake up thinking, is it really abuse? Is this really happening to me? I thought we were gonna have a great life together. What do I do now??, I thought my life was all planned out, it feels like i have to start all over again....I just cant come to reality of it all, that I HAVE a abusive husband....how could he do this to me, he told me he loved me, he said he would never hurt me, he said he would protect me.

I am having such a hard time with this...when do I tell the family, when do I confront the husband that I am leaving....BUT, is he really abusing me, this is what I keep asking myself, or is it just denial and I dont want to face the truth of it all because I have been covering it up for so long.

I think I am slowly coming out of the numbness of it, I can see the light at the end, I think, I hope,....am I going crazy or is this normal? Please someone help..




Edited 1/1/2005 1:07 am ET ET by iv_skorpio
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-05-2004
Sat, 01-01-2005 - 8:34am
I hear ya sister, I am in the same exact boat as you are. I do know that it is abuse and have told him that I cant do this anymore but then he tries to tell me he will change and that it is not worth doing this to our kids. It is always a guilt trip and part of me is having a hard time getting over that hump of feeling guilty. I know that I shouldnt feel guilty but I do.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-28-2004
Sat, 01-01-2005 - 12:04pm
Ladies, down in the off topic section if I'm not mistaken there is a questionaire that will tell you if you are being abused. Read the questions and answer them HONESTLY. This is between you and you. No need to sugar coat anything. My BF has exibited 90% of the traits. I have not question in my mind. Hopefully it will help the two of you gain clarity. Best wishes.