Ugh... he just called
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| Mon, 01-03-2005 - 2:18pm |
I feel like my brain was in a blender. I thought he was going to leave me alone )o: I feel like I can't be rude, because he is paying my rent.... it's like he has me wrapped around his finger. He said he was calling to make sure I remembered to pay the landlord.
We agreed last week when he left that "that was it... no more attempts at a relationship..." and he was going to tell his friends and family so they would know where to locate him. Well when he called a few minutes ago he said he hasn't told his parents, so if they call he wants me to lie for him... PLUS he said he doesn't want to tell them for another week or so until he is "sure".... Sure of WHAT?? Does he think I want him to move back in???? And then he was just trying to have a social conversation.... and he told me he lost weight and has been stressed out and couldn't eat... what does he want?
God... I can only cry.... right as I begin to build myself up he pulls me down )o:
I am also frightened...a couple weeks ago he came at me with a knife, but then put it on his wrist and said he was going to kill himself. He ran at me a few times when we were fighting.... he never hits me though.... why am I so afraid of him now? I feel like he has "lost it".
Edited 1/3/2005 2:25 pm ET ET by gypsyoflove

(((HUGS)))
Do you have caller ID? I used to be programmed to pick up the phone when it was STBX calling. Now I am weaning myself from it. But I have caller ID so I know when it's him. I do let him communicate with the children but I'm not at his beck and call anymore. Does that make sense?
You don't have to answer the phone when he calls. I always thought the world would end if I missed a call from STBX. So far the world hasn't ended.
I'd lay off the phone.
As for what he wants, he wants what is familiar and is afraid of letting his control of you go. At least that's my opinion. :)
You *can* do this - you *can* leave him. :)
~Me
Two things, I want to take more time but I can't (work's kind of busy) -
Don't lie for him.
CL-Blueliner4