Can I use a tape recorder?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-06-2005
Can I use a tape recorder?
6
Thu, 01-06-2005 - 4:15pm
I have no evidence of how my boyfriend really is. He is such a smooth guy. We will have to have a custody hearing because we have a child. I need to provide some type of proof that he is emotionally and verbally abusive. Can I tape record him and use it as evidence?
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Thu, 01-06-2005 - 5:06pm

I don't think so.

CL-Blueliner4

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-15-2004
Fri, 01-07-2005 - 2:52am
You can use tape recording only if in the beginning of the tape you start to him that the conversation is being recorded and that he agrees to this. His answer must be on the tape! My friend was getting divorced from her husband and she had to take him to court to get custody of their son. She had nothing but threating phone calls that he had recorded with the answering machine. Unfortunatley she was unable to use them because he was not leaving a message in the machine and did not know he was recorded. But you can use eye witness accounts if he pulls anything in the presence of anyone else, ever. they just ahve to make a signed statement. But that doesn't happen to often with guys like that no does it? If yu make tapes of any kind share them with your laywer regaurdless of whether they can be used or not, you never know. I saw one suggestion on a website that you can record the conversation then at the end of it tell him it has been taped sometimes courts will alow it if you tell them at some point on the tape it just depends on the state you live, and or the judge ruling over the case.
Good Luck
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 01-07-2005 - 9:05am
My atty was thrilled i have verbal abuse & threats on tape, especially when he involved out dd verbally (saying things against me to her). I dont know if it can be used in court, but at the very least, it gives us major bargaining power b/c its PROOF. The only thing is, be very careful! Dont get caught!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 01-07-2005 - 11:03am

Maybe you can.

When someone shows you who they are, believe them.

- Maya Angelou

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-06-2005
Fri, 01-07-2005 - 1:29pm
Thanks for that! In colorado, it appears that I do not have to have consent! :) I just have to be 'visibly present' in the conversation. (I can't tape telephone conversations without consent though)
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-26-2004
Tue, 01-18-2005 - 11:35am
There was an incident that occurred recently in my town. This woman was married to a cop that abused her and she could never get the cops to arrest him since they were all his buddies. She hired someone to put a video recorder in her house in various rooms to eventually catch some of this on video. Well, he did end up hitting her one day, calling her filthy names. It was all caught on film, so his buddies had to arrest him. They charged him not only with abuse on the wife, but child endangerment as well since their child was in the high chair watching this take place. Needless to say, she now has sole custody of the child, with him having a 2 hour supervised visitation session with the child every week!