tired of being torn

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-15-2005
tired of being torn
5
Thu, 09-08-2005 - 9:22pm
Okay, so, I've been seeing this counselor on my own now for, oh, about 5 sessions. I have explained what I am feeling, what has happened and how I don't want to fall into a deep depression again. So, every time I go, he asks me what I hope to accomplish, what I am looking for out of therapy. I tell him, I don't want to get depressed, I want to be able to talk to someone without getting yelled at. So, our last session, he goes into how is it possible that "due to my personality style, I am more sensitive than most". I know I'm sensitive, I realize that, but, geez, my H pulling a knife out in an argument, like that isn't supposed to bother me? I don't know, maybe I'm over-reacting to what he said, and I know I need to look at all perspectives, but, the big picture is, there isn't one incident, there are several and I already doubt myself enough..... I'm just feeling discouraged, thanks for listening to me vent. I know I have support here, I shouldn't need to feel that I need it from my therapist I guess........
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2005
Fri, 09-09-2005 - 9:03am
If you don't feel comfortable w/the counselor you are seeing now, you can always switch to a different one.
5yrssm 
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2003
Fri, 09-09-2005 - 9:32am

Eeks. No, you don't need to hear that. We hear that stuff from our abusers already. Threatening you with a knife is exactly that and no matter how "sensitive" you are, it remains a knife.

Is this guy DV trained? My guess is no. If you're at all interested in switching therapists, call the nearest shelter and get names. Many places offer services free of charge, and they'll understand.

Big hugs and best of luck.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-26-2004
Fri, 09-09-2005 - 10:13am
I bet ya this counselor goes home and abuses his wife. Just my 2 cents.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 09-09-2005 - 10:59am
Any therapist who says what this guy said, is not trained in DV and is most likely an abuser himself. Damn right, you're sensitive about your husband pulling a knife out during an argument. You have every right to be sensitive, outraged, and however else you want to feel about it. That's crazy, ominous, and deeply disturbing behavior. Screw that therapist. He's a complete waste of your time and money. He has no clue what he's dealing with and you have every right to be outraged with him.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-15-2005
Fri, 09-09-2005 - 4:21pm
Thanks to all who responded, I was starting to think I was as "nuts" as my H tells me I am..... I think this guys area of expertise is "personality" profiles, but, I don't really care what kind of personality I'm dealing with and that has been what we have seemed to focus on. I will start looking for someone else, thanks again!