Court tomorrow, please pray for me!
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| Mon, 05-08-2006 - 7:47pm |
Court is tomorrow to discuss custody of our two dds (5 and 2). I'm asking for sole legal custody with supervised visitation for him. We have 4 things against him, but no real physical proof, just observations.
1) Sexually molested our oldest daughter
2) He is an alcoholic, but denies it, and is still drinking
3) He admitted to me he was taking drugs (meth and cocaine)
4) He has hallucinations. He has heard people "in the attic" and last year actually started talking back to them and seeing them.
His lawyer is trying to exclude anything DD said to us (myself and my parents) about what daddy did to her as hearsay. My lawyer is trying to get it included under a state statute that sometimes allows hearsay. Since she is only 5 there is no way she can get up on the stand and admit what she told us. She doesn't like talking about it in the first place and having to do it in court would totally freak her out and she would never say anything. Hopefully the judge allows it.
His lawyer is not the nicest person. He really badgered me during the deposition and I'm a little scared about having to face him on the stand.
He also seems to be wanting to hide some things. My lawyer asked repeatedly for yhe medical reports that supposedly explains why stbx had positive drug tests (he says he had dental work and went into the hospital). Those finally showed up today, but didn't really say what drugs he was given. He also was supposed to provide the balances of his retirement funds which he still hasn't done. He sent me a message through his mom that we both deserved to keep our own retirement funds. I have no idea how much his are worth, but while he was working he put in twice what I put in. He hasn't been putting in anything for the last 5 years though, so we could be about equal. If we're equal (or at least close to it), I don't have a problem with us each keeping our own, but he won't provide any info so I don't know that. His lawyer told us to go get it ourselves and he would sign a statement saying we can get it (this was just last week he made this statement...not enough time to get a response). So my lawyer is going to ask the judge to award me both retirement funds for failure to provide disclosure. I doubt she will do that, but it will be nice to see if she will.
His parents are also going to be there. His dad called me a while back to threaten me that if stbx and I didn't work it out, they would have to throw the same type of dirt on me as I am trying to throw on him. They're actually going after my parents, because they don't have anything on me (I guess being a goody two shoes sometimes works out good).
The custody evaluation only said that I have problems with bending too much to those around me, but otherwise that I am the better parent. It gave 2 different recommendations depending on how the judge finds about the sexual abuse. And even if the judge does not find that he is a danger to the children there is still the alcoholism and drug use to be dealt with, but he could be given joint custody on a conditional basis if he is not determined to be a danger.
I know I'm not going to get any sleep tonight, but I will try. It's an all day court hearing, so we should have plenty of time to present our case, but even with all day, we may not get everything in. I don't think we'll find out anything tomorrow, but I'll update you on Wednesday.
Anyway, wish me luck and keep us in your prayers.

My prayers will be with you today so that you can rest and feel prepared and tomorrow for peace and strength so that the court sees what truly needs to be done for these children.
Lisa