CKFriend, are you out there?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2006
CKFriend, are you out there?
3
Sat, 06-10-2006 - 12:34pm
CKFriend,
Haven't heard from you this week. Are you okay??
V.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-02-2005
Mon, 06-12-2006 - 7:43am

Hi

Yes, I am still here. I still haven't told H I want out, but on the good side he has been on business travel this past week and not due back until this coming friday. It's given me a lot of time to think. And if this was a good marriage I would not be so happy that he is away I would miss him, which I do not. So I have been keeping busy: got my pay checks going into my old checking account (he doesn't have access), have been rerouting withdraws to my account, changing my beneficiary to my children, and the lawyer is just waiting on my call to send the paperwork. So now I just need to stick to my gut and tell him it's not going to work out, sell the house, and me and the kids find a new home (which I already have my eye on one - but first step first - tell him). So hopefully my heart will listen to my head and not get in the way. Keep your fingers crossed and pray for me. Thanks.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2006
Mon, 06-12-2006 - 7:56am
Glad you are okay! Isn't it nice to feel you can take a deep breath without having someone yelling or criticizing?? Good for you and the kids. It is nice to have him gone for a while, I know.
Have a great week! I will be hanging around the board, so check in when you have time.
V.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-05-2004
Mon, 06-12-2006 - 12:08pm

Have you considered just up and leaving him w/o giving him any advance warning? I suggest this, because abusers sometimes go ballistic when you tell them it's over, which can be quite dangerous. You know your situation better than I, but I would plan for the possibility. Check out our Personalized Safety plan for ideas on how to leave safely:

http://messageboards.ivillage.com/n/mb/message.asp?webtag=iv-rldomesting&msg=25758.1&ctx=512

Best of luck, and do keep us posted.

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