can't sleep

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-29-2005
can't sleep
1
Mon, 10-30-2006 - 9:24pm

I feel so emotionally devastated right now. I have no hopes or dreams anymore. My family has totally rejected me on top of the pain of living with the pain of dealing with my husband. The hole in the wall above the head of the bed is like this neon sign of the end of my life as I've known it. Not only do I not have a marriage, I don't have my mother and my brothers. I have a big gaping hole of nothingness.

And I can't even cry about it. No tears will fall - they are useless.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-21-2006
Tue, 10-31-2006 - 8:57am
I understand. I'm so sorry for your lonliness. I'm sure you'll find support here, it's definitely helping me. You're reaching out, that's all you can bring yourself to do, it will get better. I had forgotten who I was, what mattered to me. I felt like this shell of a person, who existed to make H happy. It never did happen though, so I focused on myself a bit. Just now do I have a plan for getting back into finishing my education and getting a job. Can you go to counseling? It really has helped me begin to find me. When your whole environment is negative, how else could you feel? Wishing you all the best, keep us posted.