my mom told me to stay

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-21-2003
my mom told me to stay
5
Thu, 12-07-2006 - 1:45pm
I am just crying and crying. I just need to get the important stuff and leave. My mom told me to stay. She doesn't care how unhappy and how horrible it has been for me. She only cares that she can see her grandaughter if I am close. It is so, so, so hurtful. I can't find my birth certificate, I don't know where the important stuff is. I have cash and credit cards and a place to go I guess that is all that really matters anyway.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-20-2006
Thu, 12-07-2006 - 1:54pm
I know its gotta be hard but hey...birth certs are easy to get copies made
mine cost 20 bucks, go if that's all that's holding you back....Good lucK!
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2006
Thu, 12-07-2006 - 2:10pm

You know what.. it is not what you MOM wants you to do, it is not what your SO wants you to do... IT IS WHAT "YOU" WANT TO DO. It is all about you now okay. You are the only one living youe life and you need to do what you want. You can only please yourself. Don't worry about pleasing others, because it won't happen. If they want to be mad at you, then whatever. Do what you feel is best.

"She doesn't care how unhappy and how horrible it has been for me. She only cares that she can see her grandaughter if I am close."

If she cares so much about seeing her grandaughter, then she can move closer to you, or visit you more often. She is being very selfish and you don't need that right now. She has NO CLUE what you have been thru. She isn't even thinking about your feelings.

I'm sorry for being so harsh about your mom, but that is the last thing you need right now. You don't need someone telling you to deal with the abuse so SHE can see your daughter. That isn't right!! It makes me mad at how she told you to stay.

DO WHAT YOU WANT!!! That is all that matters. It is your life and do what you want to do!!

Good Luck
Lauren

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-25-2006
Thu, 12-07-2006 - 4:15pm

Hi love,
I don't want to sound mean, but you know what if mom really cares about her granddaughter, then mom will think that it's best for grandbaby to be in a healthy and happy environment.
Your daughter needs YOU to be strong, and say I am going to happy, healthy, and going to give this to my daughter, we deserve this. I had to forget about what other people were saying to me and I know it's hard, but ultimately it's up to you. THINK about you and dd ONLY. What advice would you give me???

I'm praying for your strength

Lisa

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2003
Thu, 12-07-2006 - 6:25pm

Sam honey, I'm in agreeance w/the others on this one. And truthfully, parents aren't always right. She just wants you to stay so she can be close to her granddaughter. Ok, fine and dandy, but truth be told, you are in a dangerous living environment and she refuses to comprehend that because she has allowed herself to cloud her own judgement. You are a grown woman and you know what you have to do.

If all you are lacking is your birth certificate, you can obtain copies of those like the other poster mentioned. Find out what county you were born in and you contact the county courthouse and they will point you in the right direction. As long as you got your drivers license/ID, your credit cards/debit cards, any copies of insurance documents such as life insurance, your childs birth certificate, and gov't issued documentation, then you will be fine. I've got more info on that sort of thing on my website as well which is the same website for this board as well.

You're also more than welcome to join us over at Domestic Abuse New Beginnings where we will be able to help you as well and some of the same group of ladies here, you will see there also. The link is down in my sigline. Keep us posted and don't listen to what your momma is telling you because she doesn't understand the dynamics of abuse. It's time to start taking care of you and your child now, now what mom wants. (((HUGS)))

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-21-2003
Fri, 12-08-2006 - 12:21pm
Thank you ladies very much!!!!