Back here.... for good....

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-2003
Back here.... for good....
6
Fri, 12-12-2003 - 9:27pm
del


Edited 7/2/2004 10:24 am ET ET by serenityhopefaith
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2003
Fri, 12-12-2003 - 10:50pm
Hi- I hope you're proud of what you did, because from how I see it, it took a lot of courage. If I am speaking naiively, it is because I have only responded to this last post of yours, but from what I read, you took a stand, and stood up for yourself. It sounds like his life is full of so many responsibilities and you might have been the little bit of sweetness that he had. After a while, all of us realize that we are worth more than being someone's "little bit of sweetness" on the side. We see that we deserve to be someone's partner, not their plaything. Good for you! There will be many times that you wonder if the next time, the timing could be right- try not to fall into that. Remember the strength that it took for you to take the step that you did. It's one step at a time, and you just took the most important one! The people on this board will help you with the other steps, even when you think you can't walk any futher.

Snap

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-2003
Sat, 12-13-2003 - 12:45am
Thank you snap for your post. It helps. I started posting here the day after Thanksgiving and after a few days I thought I could end things then, but I couldn't. But this time, not only am I doing it for myself (and my marriage), but for MM's W and all of his children. They are having so many marital problems and even though I am not the cause of all of them, I know that I sure haven't helped the situation. It's hard to want to still be with them, yet, I love him so much that I truly want his marriage to work out... sounds crazy I know. It's hard, but I have always said, time heals everything! Thanks again!

~Serenity
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2003
Sat, 12-13-2003 - 10:15am
Good luck to you, Serenity. It's hard to let go when the feelings are still there, and yet sometimes I think it's easier than if there were no feelings at all, or if they weren't reciprocated. At least you know that there's one more person out there in the world that loves you. And MM knows that even if your EMA is over, there's someone else out there who loves him. I do think you can find comfort and strength in that.

Anna

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-2003
Sat, 12-13-2003 - 12:38pm
Thank you Anna. Yes, MM and I have many times, even recently that it is just a fact that we will in our hearts always want to be with each other until death, but that isn't realistic... but it is a fact that won't ever go away. This is the first time though that I TRULY do not want him calling me. All other times, I either expected him to (which he has always done) or deep in my heart I secretly wanted him to call and work things out. But not this time, it went on too long with too much heartache. His wife also threatened to come see me (they live 3 hours away) to confront me, but my H still has no clue. His W thinks we are just friends, but had just made the comment, "Ok, so if I go down there and see her and ask her, her side of the story, she'll say the same thing?",and of course he said yes. To me that has gone too far! So, yes, it hurts and yes I will miss him as I had allowed him to become my best friend, but as someone else put it, I will not miss the heartache, the stress, the lies and deceit!

Thanks again!

~Serenity
Avatar for shescomeundone2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Sat, 12-13-2003 - 1:42pm
Serenity....

What you are doing is going to be good for you in the long run, although right now you are in alot of pain. The fact that you care enough to step aside to see if XMM can work things out with his wife is unselfish and shows character. I am proud to know you.

Jazzdiva

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-2003
Sat, 12-13-2003 - 3:39pm
Thank you she's. Even as time goes by I still don't want him contacting me, again this is a first. On the radio a minute ago was a song called I wish you well or something like that, and as I listened to the words about a love that will never be again, I didn't cry or get mad or anything, I just thought to myself, I really do wish him well.

It's good to be back on this side with you again she's. I hope you are doing ok! I am behind on reading posts, so forgive me if I have missed anything!

~Serenity