This Is Hard

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2003
This Is Hard
2
Mon, 12-15-2003 - 9:30am
Well I am at work. Trying to move on, and think its over. He asked me to go down and smoke, we did. I noticied he had his ring on. I said, well I guess you know what your feelings are if you have the ring back on. He said no, he put it back on yesterday to keep her from continueing to bug him.

I know this was stupid. I asked him if he missed me, or thought about me. He said he did.

I am trying to be strong. It is just hurting.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-19-2003
In reply to: pax29727
Mon, 12-15-2003 - 11:05am
Pax... PLEASE stop putting yourself in the line of fire because doing so will only bring you more and more pain! Next time he asks you to go for a smoke, say no thanks! You also need to stop torturing yourself by asking him questions....honey, what difference do his answers mean when they don't change anything!

Sure, he loves you, he misses you, he wishes he could be coming home to you but the bottom line is he is NOT. period! Please stop being a glutton for punishment because you deserve better!

Also, you need to accept, come to the realization of not *thinking* it's over but that it is over because regardless of what comes out of this man's mouth, it's all lies. MM do not put their wedding rings back on because their wife badgers them...they do it because they want to. I hope and pray for you (because I know how horribly hard it is) that you use the significance of the wedding ring as your LAST proof that he's committed himself to someone else.

Let's work on you becoming strong enough to say NO thanks to all his future communications......OK? You will see that once you do this, you will be empowered to keep saying NO and with enough time, you'll start caring less and less about him because you will be moving on with YOUR life.

Good Luck to you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-11-2003
In reply to: pax29727
Mon, 12-15-2003 - 6:29pm
I no it's hard trying to let go but you can do it.I'm in the same boat.It's been 1 week and 1 day of no physical cn which is good considering we to work together.And it is very hard but I'm confident that I can stick to my words when I say that this is it.Just keep good thoughts and be strong and you will get through it.Good luck!