Day 4 of NC
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Day 4 of NC
| Mon, 12-15-2003 - 12:04pm |
Today is day 4 of NC. Up until this morning I was so proud of myself and what I was doing... not only for me and for xMM, but for his W and family as well. Even though NC is imperative for all of the above reasons, today it hit me like a TON of bricks. I have cried almost all morning. Washing dishes, tears... making my son lunch, tears... playing with my son, tears..... I know this will eventually end, or at least I hope it does, the pain that is. December 6th was our 1 year anniversary, so these next few months hold so many wonderful memories, and I have the January trip that I cancelled to haunt me too. I guess it's like a death, where for the first year all of the firsts are so very hard and the plans that had to be cancelled, but then after that, over time it gets easier. It just really hurts.
Thanks for letting me share.
~Serenity
Thanks for letting me share.
~Serenity

Jazzdiva
Don't know if you remember me, but I met you last week on the other side. I now have just made the decision (5 minutes actually) to end EMA. I have not told MM yet, but the effects it's having on my friendships and other relationships, it's got to end. I've lost your email and would love to have it again to help through this.
~Serenity
Anyway, it was a hard, hard day... but I made it through and I am so glad. One day at a time, or like earlier today one minute or hour at a time!
Thanks again for letting me vent!
Give yourself the time you need and I promise, it will become easier.
Hugs to you!