Why is this so difficult?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Why is this so difficult?
2
Wed, 12-17-2003 - 10:49am
I don't post here very often because I hate to admit my failures but I could use some advise today. My EMA has been on and off for about 2 years now. There are times that I don't want anything to do with him anymore. Not because he's mean to me or disrespects me in any way but simply that it's so much work to maintain this relationship that it's wearing me out. I have a husband at home that is trying desperately to get our relationship back in order (as if it ever was) and I'm just plain tired of working so hard at not having one with him. I don't love him but I guess I can tolerate him. There is no future with MM and we both know it so why does the EMA still exist? He claims that he is still attracted to me and likes to be around me and talk. We are going to lunch today so we can get this out in the open and put something to rest. Something's got to give and I need closure. I've been trying to stay away from him to prepare myself for the day that it really is over but I can't resist him. He is such a good person (except for the fact that he's cheating on his wife) that one part of me doesn't want this to end but the other part is worn out. I often sit and wonder how he feels about me, he never comes right out and says it but his actions speak volumes sometimes. I need some help today ladies, please send me your strength to do this.

Thanks,

OM4M
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-25-2003
Wed, 12-17-2003 - 2:36pm
Since you have the golden opportunity to seek closure.. use it.. write down every damn thing you've ever wanted to ask him.. and everything you think you'll want to know. Then answer his questions..Say goodbye and don't look back. Know that he at least had enough respect for you to give you that opportunity. Once you leave, know that it's for good.

Don't fanticize about what could of been. Because it never will be. The most important thing is for you to be happy with yourself and by yourself if necessary. This guy can't be the cure that for all that ails you, and you know that. You wrote that, in your post.

Yeah it sucks.. not to have that person that feeds the ego on call, but your ready to start walking without a crutch.

Be strong! Go do what you must and come back home to yourself.

KATJA

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 12-17-2003 - 2:59pm

He is such a good person (except for the fact that he's cheating on his wife)


Boy did this catch my eye!!

Grammie