Cali is here finally..

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2003
Cali is here finally..
2
Fri, 12-26-2003 - 12:05am
First I want to say thank you for asking about me. And thanks she's for telling about my little incident with the milk. Who says you should never cry over spilled milk. It really messed my keyboard up. I have a new board now and am back in service now so watch out. Actually mom is still her for a nother couple weeks so I will be laying low.

Eatchquake...Well Chris is right I am in San Diego (southern Cali). No earthquake but right now it has been raining for two days and right now is sending power surges through my computer. But my mom was suppose to be where the earthquake was that day for a meeting and didn't go thank god.

I haven't been on for days and want to catch up with anyone. I will read everyones post a little later. I am drained.

I am being very self destructive right now. I have called him, e-mailed his other woman and other stuff. I am on the verge of reading his wifes board that will hurt me bad. I want to stop. Katja you are sooooo right I do cause a lot of drama. I realize this. I realize I am hurting myself. I guess I have low self esteem and feel like I need punished. I am really depressed again and feel like I need to crawl in bed for a week. I am eating but my health is still pretty bad. I went to the Dr on x-mas eve for tremors, blackouts and bleeding. The dr said it is a reaction to the upped dose of prozac. She said cut it in half and go back to the dr who prescribed it. So I have to get an appt in about a week if I can. I slept all day today so no x-mas day for me. I am having bad cramps not with a headache.

I am going o cook dinner for my mom and try to do some laundry. Gotta go back to work tommorow for my five days on.

I don't need pity everyone. I know you all care very much about me and I care for you too. Just wanted to give an update. I will get better sometime I just wish it was ooner then later and I wish I had stopped this a long time ago before it got this far. I am trying to work through this awful mess I and let me say that again that I got myself into.

Katja baby update please???? I spent yesterday with my niece I can't keep my hand off her I want to hold her or watch her. I want a baby. So it is the 25th no baby right???? Jan 9th!!!!!!!

Love you guys and Merry Christmas

Cali~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Fri, 12-26-2003 - 12:16am

No pity forthcoming from me....just wondering what you get from "self-destructing:, as you put it and re-contacting the xOM, besides ripping off your emotional scabs to hurt some more....


Hope your holiday season improves...including no further contacts with the x.....new year coming; perhaps you'll keep all those resolutions about moving forward that you've made...including more attention to your immediate family without stealing time from them any longer for the xOM. They count, he doesn't.....


jmhoo,


cl-nre

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-25-2003
Fri, 12-26-2003 - 9:34am
Nope,

No baby yet! I'm really hoping for this week! BUT if it dosen't happen this week then it dosen't really matter.

I'm kind of just getting used to waiting, waiting, waiting. Here I am watching another episode on

TLC. A baby story.

I'll keep you posted.

That's it I'm going running today! ha ha....

Be good Cali! I hope your're finding peace.

Katja