Who'd like to whomp me first?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Who'd like to whomp me first?
4
Fri, 04-16-2004 - 9:39am
Man I really did it now. OM was heading up north this weekend on a fishing thing with some friends (I've later learned it is 3 couples but that's neither here nor there). Tuesday OM's 5 week duration girlfriend found a note I left on his door that read "sorry I missed you." She got all mad and drove off vowing never to see him again. Unfortunately her brother was one of the men going on the fishing trip so OM felt it necessary to stay away from the trip. On Thursday out of the blue OM told me the fishing trip was back on. I thought Hmmmm Yes I am blonde but I'm not that blonde. I asked "Has she called you?" Well as a matter of fact on Wednesday she phoned him and had asked "are you up for some company? I'm in your driveway." Tee hee.

So after hearing that on Thursday I decided OK here's my chance... the end of it all. I told him "I'll be at your house at 5." I walked in and handed him the key to his home. He told me he thought that might be what I was going to do. He began crying and handed me a letter he had written to me. It read "Please don't tell me this is the end. I'm still waiting the "wait." I will be there when you are tired. Truly tired of what you have now and want change. I know you're afraid of change but it can be good. I will be there when you are ready to be with me. But you have to decide someday what you truly want." The Wait is a poem I gave to him that was written by Richard Brautigan.

During the half hour after handing him the key we talked a bit. We've talked so much over all these months we wonder how we still find things to say. I told him about this group.. how people try no contact and then the next day we sit and wonder "is he mad at me, is he alright, if he doesn't call me will it mean he no longer cares" stuff like that. So on my way into work I knew better but I wanted to call him just to say "Please know that I am not mad in any way and I want you to know how special this was to me." He knows this stuff but I made the call anyway. And the damn girlfriend was lying next to him and she went off. She barked orders of things she wanted him to say to me and he would not say them. What an awkward thing. I truly had no idea she would be there. In my head I had conjured up the vision of him in his misery crying himself to sleep. Good grief! If she would have shut up for a moment she would have learned that I said my peace and had full intentions of leaving him alone. But no..... now she has broken off everything with him, called him a liar (altho he never lied) and stormed off in a tizzy. Now I have made it so he has nobody. We previously discussed what would happen if she learned he still cared about me. He said that was a chance he was willing to take. But geez.

One Saddened Elf

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2004
Fri, 04-16-2004 - 10:46am
Oh Oh Oh....me first! WHOMP

He knows you are not mad and be thankful you were able talk to him and have closure. If you love him let him go and allow him to do what he needs to do also. I know it stinks. The drama won't stop until you find the strength for:

NCNCNCNCNCNCNCNCNCNCNCNCNCNCNCNCNCNCNCNCNCNNCNCNC

Be strong and keep your chin up. We all do an oops sometimes.






iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Fri, 04-16-2004 - 3:50pm
Thanks. I seem to be feeding off this drama the past week or so. I met him at lunch time where I took his house key off my ring and handed it to him. He gave me back the key to my office and I put it on my key ring. Before we separated he picked up my wad of keys and slid his house key back on it. He gave me a wink.

So what does all that mean? Am I completely back to square one? Well at least he knows I'm not mad. Oi Vey!!

elf

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2004
Fri, 04-16-2004 - 10:05pm
Elf, I'm not going to whomp you, I figure you've whomped yourself enough. Man! What a bad scene!! Thinkingtomuch is right, though, you've got to let this poor guy go!!!
Avatar for shescomeundone2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Sat, 04-17-2004 - 9:45pm
Put yourself in the girlfriend's shoes for a moment....I wouldn't want this man if he were still in contact or in love with is ex married lover. Would you?

Jazzdiva