He called- closure or not??
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| Thu, 12-09-2004 - 6:32pm |
Just had a conversation with xOM. He called, first about a work-related matter. He was in a far different mood than he has been for the last few weeks. We talked about his speech last night (when he started reciting some of the same things he said to me when we broke up); he said that it wasn't intentional and that it was directed at himself. I think I believed him, even though I still think it was insensitive even if unintentional. He was very mellow, talked about how he was doing but sounded sad. He kept everything above-board, asked me how I am doing. I told him honestly that I was trying to work on things with my husband and that we were doing okay. I tried to sound as upbeat as possible. He responded very quietly and sadly that he was trying to be okay. He admitted that his health is not very good...I felt a little scared for him.
Also, he told me his parents were coming to visit for Christmas; I said I hoped to get a chance to meet them (probably shouldn't have said that) but was a bit worried how it would go, since he had taken them a picture of me and had told them that he hoped to marry me when things settled down. He said he still wants me to meet them. If he brings them to work to meet everyone, I probably will see them; just may have to stand with some other blondes and hope they don't remember my photo. Not sure how I'm feeling about all this; I guess I had a moment of second-guessing myself and thinking that he really was sincere and for a moment that we could have been together; then feeling very sad about everything; for getting involved in the first place and betraying my vows; for bad timing; for losing someone who had meant so much to me (don't beat me up for that, please). It made me remember, when we weren't acting like "The War of the Roses," that we once were very good friends. Just feeling a little blue tonight. Don't know if this was closure or not. At least he was kind; a little respect goes a long way, doesn't it? Even though I didn't need it to heal, it makes the healing a little faster. I think. God help me keep from regressing here.
I didn't tell him I am moving, by the way. Have to tell my boss first. Going to do it Monday.

Gal
No beatings, not to worry.
When you close a stage in your life, then it is time to move on to the next stage, that stage cannot include XMM if you are to move forward and recover your marriage and family, you know this.
Only you can decide to regress, if you don't decide to do that it will not happen that power is yours and yours alone XMM cannot cause it to happen, your husband cannot cause it to happen it's all up to you and I for one don't think your the same person who got involved with XMM you have grown sense then.
JMHO
Free
Edited 12/9/2004 8:30 pm ET ET by mefreenow
Free,
Did you mean to direct your reply to newsgal? (You typed Pal, that's me) and newsgal is the one who posted this thread. Just wondering. Sorry if I"m messed up.
Gal
Your welcome little miss smarty pants. :o)
Happiness will find you again, I know it will trust me on this.
Free