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| Mon, 12-27-2004 - 7:29am |
Affairs are so excitiing. Someone thinks you are really special, so much so, that he will not share you with anyone. He tells you how much you make him feel alive again, that his marriage is dead but stays there for his kids. You think, "How noble. He just loves his kids too much to leave her," and so you hang on to the dream that over time he will change his mind. YOU can get him to fall in love with you, and then someday he will leave that terrible marriage and want to be with you. In the meantime, something begins to transform inside of you that is uncomfortable, unexplainable, and you start to question his motives....and your insecurities....
And then you begin to

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Good Morning,
I lurk alot on this board lately. My affair ended in Aug. This board and the people on it were incredible when I felt that my life was falling apart. I have been away for about 1.5-2 months because I am finally at peace with all of this mess I created.
Your posting is so true, The deep hidden feelings you want so bad to share with others but you know you cant is what hurt the most and not to mention the little time here and there you manage to get with this other person only made me feel cheap everytime it happened. I feel the biggest burden lifted off my shoulders. I miss him but I am glad its over because I have some type of normality back in my life. Whom ever says that affairs are not risky think again. They consume your whole being and can destroy your entire personality.....
I am smiling again after 3.5 years of always looking over my shoulders and feeling the most miserable person in the world because I couldn't have him the way I wanted. My marriage today is very strong and happy again. I am too........
I wish you lots of peace and strength....
Ladybug
P.S., Ladybug, you said your marriage is stonger now, did your husband know about the affair?
Hello JR
No my hubby never found out thank god for at least sparring me that much more pain.
I have worked very hard with my marriage, not to mention my husband is a great person who I have betrayed in a senseless way and I feel so guilty for doing so, but I can only spend my time now trying to do what is right. It is not easy getting over the OM . Only time heals all wounds.....
Good Luck. Keep up the NC. Most important stay strong.....
Ladybug
"and I know that I could never trust him if our marriages ended. And I would't expect him to trust me."
Ditto. I was finding it impossible to trust him, and everything he was telling me. Ironically, I trust my husband 100% and always will. So what do I want from a man that is cheating on his wife, and what the hell would he want me for as a woman cheating on her husband. I wanted my sanity back. I didn't want to always question if what he was telling me was lies or not. With my H, I know where he is and what he's doing 24/7, and therefore, my mind is at peace. My H is one of those rare men that have integrity and would never put himself in the position of betraying me like I have him.
So why did I do it? All the reasons the original poster stated. It's SO not worth the price your soul pays for all the lies you live with.
To All,
WHAT???? I can't believe this! I stumbled across another board a few moments ago (see below) and there was *MY* post that I wrote from my kitchen computer back in December, "STARING ME IN FACE" submitted by another poster....I can't believe someone stole it; WORD FOR WORD!!! Actually, I'm kinda laughing, but kinda not. I feel violated, sort of....but, I guess if you put it out there, someone is going to use you...(Remind you of anything?)
I am wondering what you guys think about this? Is it OK for someone to steal your posts?
Leaves me feeling a tad bit unnerved like I've got a cyber-stalker, or something....
http://www.affairs-help.com/ubb/Forum8/HTML/001403.html
Oh well, later ladies,
Id
**Id**
That's crazy! Well, I guess you can take it as a compliment. But that's nuts, she should have at least said that she found this powerful post and thought she'd pass it along..rather than make it seem like she wrote it.
Unbelievable!
Thanks Hurtpup. You made me feel a little better... But hey, being an XOW, guess I know a little something about being a thief myself, so guess I shouldn't be surprised it was hijacked ;)
Id
**Id**
id,
That is very eerie. I remember reading that when you posted back in Dec. If you think about it on a positive note, your written words are impacting other folks enough to plagerize (sp?) I don't know whether i would feel touched or really p.o'd?
And i am a little concerned for the others that are on that post sharing their stories with such a cut and paste fraud! Oh well, what do you do?
~nuttmeg
Well, Doggone it! Shouldn't I be getting royalties or something???? <<<>>>
Yeah, my heart kinda stopped for a second when I recognized that it was mine. I just kept reading it thinking, "Huh?" Took a minute to register. Kinda like the fist time XOM said, "We need to stop this." ARGH!!!! Yeah, he broke up with me, then I broke up with him, and then we both broke up together. <----actually the best way to end things.
How are you doing, my little Nuttybutter????
Hugs,
Id
**Id**
id,
Thank you for making me see how selfish I was and what I did to xOM....
Diva
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