Sorry you are hurting. Being in a working situation can't be easy I know..... Don't beat yourself up. You reached out again to him and got hurt again- take this as a LESSON LEARNED.
NC/LC= No new hurts.
Stop opening yourself up to him. Stop giving him the power. Imagine that right now, a brick wall is going up all around you, and he can no longer get past that wall. Dust yourself off, and start over. Don't let him have any more satisfaction knowing that you are pining over him. Be done with this.
oh thank you so much alwayst. You're right Im gonna leave work now as I am just sitting here on the verge of tears. Dunno why I am getting so upset like this when there are so many more important things life that I should be thinking of.
I honestly think XAp is like a sick addiction I have. I know its so wrong but yet i just can't seem to control it.
What was I thinking letting him know how I felt about him!!! me and my stupid big mouth. I always blab everything that is in my mind and heart. Whilst spending all day yesterday telling me how much he wanted me, missed me, thought about me etc he tells me today "ooooh sorry for messing you around I feel bad now" WTF... he is been weasling his way back in for months and I just thought he was being friendly now that his girlf wasn't around but know I know he was on fishing exbedition to see if I still fancied him, if i was actually as happy as I seemed in my life now and if I was missing him. It was'nt about him liking me at all it was about feeding his massive ego. I wouldn't mind but he was been talking to me casually for weeks showing a massive interest in my life....and now I was all part of his big plan to boost his ego :( what a fool Ive been.
Your summation is spot on. He doesn't care about you or how you're doing. He was looking for his own ego boost/stroke. You gave it to him so now he's done with you for a while. Damn, that really freakin' hurts to hear, doesn't it?? Well, we only have ourselves to blame. Learn from that mistake (and we're all allowed to make them because we are humans) but
Encouragement? You want encouragement for rekindling your A after a year apart?!?! You know better!
GET OUT NOW! That's about as encouraging as I can be. Nothing you haven't heard before. It needs to come from within you. You either want to be a doormat or you don't. Period.
Haven't you had enough? Have you reached your "enough is enough" point? I know that's what it took for me. You are hurting... nothing good will come of this situation, so lift your head up and be done. Everyday from now on leads you toward healing if you end the A. If you don't, you just prolong this pain and heartache. You can do it. If I can, you can. Be strong.
thanks so much everyone. You dont realise how much your words mean to me. I was in such a state of depression yesterday and you really helped snap me out of that. I am determined now to go back to LC/NC. I was doing fine for months and it was because i was LC. The moment i allowed him back in it was like being back at square one...So I pray to god this has taught me a lesson this time. I dont care what he says to me now I am not going to give in to him again.
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GVC,
I'm wrapping my arms around you to give you an
Gal,
Sorry you are hurting. Being in a working situation can't be easy I know..... Don't beat yourself up. You reached out again to him and got hurt again- take this as a LESSON LEARNED.
NC/LC= No new hurts.
Stop opening yourself up to him. Stop giving him the power. Imagine that right now, a brick wall is going up all around you, and he can no longer get past that wall. Dust yourself off, and start over. Don't let him have any more satisfaction knowing that you are pining over him. Be done with this.
Love and hugs,
Hazel
oh thank you so much alwayst. You're right Im gonna leave work now as I am just sitting here on the verge of tears. Dunno why I am getting so upset like this when there are so many more important things life that I should be thinking of.
I honestly think XAp is like a sick addiction I have. I know its so wrong but yet i just can't seem to control it.
Gal,
Encouragement? You want encouragement for rekindling your A after a year apart?!?! You know better!
GET OUT NOW! That's about as encouraging as I can be. Nothing you haven't heard before. It needs to come from within you. You either want to be a doormat or you don't. Period.
Gal,
It's time for you to hold up your head, take a deep breath, say to yourself "NO MORE!" and resolve to stick with it.
Gal-
Haven't you had enough? Have you reached your "enough is enough" point? I know that's what it took for me. You are hurting... nothing good will come of this situation, so lift your head up and be done. Everyday from now on leads you toward healing if you end the A. If you don't, you just prolong this pain and heartache. You can do it. If I can, you can. Be strong.
NC since January 28, 2010
http://secretlifeofjane.wordpress.com/
NC/LC since January 28, 2010
http://secretlifeofjane.wordpress.com/
Gal,
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