Can't be happy for him....

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2010
Can't be happy for him....
9
Wed, 03-31-2010 - 6:28pm

The physical part of my affair ended more than 10 years ago.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-21-2009
Wed, 03-31-2010 - 7:49pm

Hi Lisa and welcome. Ten years is a long time to hold on to someone, and obviosuly this man was providing you with something that you were not able to find in your marriage. Maybe there was that little fantasy on the back of your mind that sometime, somehow you will end up together, and now you are facing the reality that this will never happen and there is no second chances after all.

It is time for you to step back and give him a chance to move on with his life - I am a little surprised that it actually took him that long - but again, everybody's different. The most loving and respecting thing you can do for him is to leave him alone once and for all, and grieve and heal yourself.

XOXO
Gone

**Bloodied but unbowed**
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2009
Wed, 03-31-2010 - 8:01pm

Lisa,


<

   ~Iddy~ 


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2010
Wed, 03-31-2010 - 8:07pm
Thank you so much for responding, Gone.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2010
Wed, 03-31-2010 - 8:31pm

Thank you cl-iddy!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2009
Thu, 04-01-2010 - 12:38am

Hello Lisa -


Welcome to EAS.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2010
Thu, 04-01-2010 - 8:55am
Hi Lisa, Welcome to EAS. I hope you've read the thread about No Contact in the healing garden. It really is the best way to heal. You've held onto him for a long time. It's time to let him go. In times when it feels like I won't be able to let my xap go, I remind myself that no contact is a gift to both of us. It allows us both to move on, deal with the ending in our own way and get back to real life. No contact would be a gift to your xap and I hope you will consider it. It's time to let him go so you can both heal.
Jane
NC/LC since January 28, 2010
http://secretlifeofjane.wordpress.com/
Jane
NC/LC since January 28, 2010
http://secretlifeofjane.wordpress.com/
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-19-2009
Thu, 04-01-2010 - 8:59am

Hi Lisa,


I, as well, can very much relate to your story. I am a long time lurker, and have been waiting for someone to come along with a similar situation.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2010
Thu, 04-01-2010 - 9:56am

Hi Jane,


I have been following your story while lurking and I am amazed at your journey and the level of maturity and insight that you have at your age.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-20-2009
Thu, 04-01-2010 - 12:25pm

Welcome to EAS lisaspring....I am really slammed today getting ready for Easter break and won't be on here for the next couple of days, but I wanted

BE the change that you want to see in the world! Life loves me and I love life! <3