Find a Conversation
|Sun, 08-12-2007 - 10:02am|
Hello fellow FF wives. I need your help. I fear that without some support, I may be "formerly" a FF's wife.
Here we go - I have been married to my OFD FF for 5 years. I left my home, my job and my family to follow his dream. When he started on the department, we were not yet married, no kids.
Now, 5 years later, I find myself feeling alone, and second to his job. Single parenting 2 small kids and a teen and trying to have my own career has been hell. When I talk to him about this, he states that I am just jealous of his job, hours, and work relationships.
I am almost 40, married to a 32 yo who works with 26 yo's who date 21 yo's. This age span makes it difficult at times to enjoy FF functions where there are late nights, a lot of drama, and partying. Just not much in common some times. Alcohol seems to be linked to many many of the outings. I enjoy a glass of wine or good beer, but I have small kids, and a career, and can not afford the hang-over or DUI.
My husband also seems to put our relationship behind that of his FF "brothers". He acts different around them - not attentive or respectful.
I am very proud of my OFD FF, but insist that family and marriage be made to be the forefront. Duty calls, this I truly try to understand. The brotherhood is sacred, and a relationship that you can only really understand if you are in it. But I am truly in fear that I just can't cope with being second. This was not in our vows.