Teen sex
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Teen sex
| Mon, 05-17-2004 - 7:04pm |
I have an issue, and need some opinions. My neighbor and I have been friendly for years(our kids are best friends). She recently confided in me(she was crying)that she found a whole load of teen porn on her husband's computer dating back a few years. Would you allow your daughter(she's 15) to be around him unsupervised? Legalities aside, do you think he's capable of acting on his fantasies?

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The Dad is obviously intrigued with young girls and his wife is very disturbed by what she saw, so for your peace of mind, why not just keep her at home when the dad is home and have their child visit your daughter at your home only?
Your neighbor's reaction may be a indication that her husband has a serious problem but regardless of all that, your daughter depends on you to keep her safe.
That being said, I would suggest that the wife have an open, straight forward conversation about it with the husband. "this is what I found, why is it here, does it interest you, is this something you have a problem with, etc." If the man is generally not a weirdo and there are no other indications he is into kids, then I would give him the benefit of the doubt. He may have stubbled across it and out of shear curiosity looked. That doesn't mean that I, as a mother, would take a chance letting him be unsupervised with my kids. Not for 1 second!
I have been with my SO for 3 years. I KNOW that he does not have an interest in teen sex videos, so if I saw it on his computer and he told me a believable story, I would trust him. I would be very alarmed, but I would believe him if he said it was a one time, curiosity thing that was not something that aroused him, etc.
Just my 2 cents. Also, as I note, I am going to be very cautious with who my children are alone with. So many "trusted" friends, coaches, uncles, neighbors, could molest.
Sara
Teens can be seduced by adults and THAT'S the issue, not physical force. He would never try to force her to do anything because he would be headed straight to jail even faster.
Edited 5/18/2004 12:42 pm ET ET by katmandoo2001
If it was my daughter, I would probably keep an open eye on how he acts around her and just to be on the safe side, would not let her be alone with him. But I'd also confront him about that. I know R has had unwanted sites pop up onto our home computer and he gets upset. He doesn't want to look at gay guys or pregnancy sex. There is SO MUCH out there. Maybe he just looked up one or two sites out of curiosity, but then they sent him a bunch of others. Who knows? She should ask him.
It happens to the smartest and most aware girls. Why? Because pedophiles are excellent liars and manipulators and they know how to seduce kids. AND they are typically someone the girl already trusts.
I don't think it's wise to allow the girl to be at the neighbor's house at all and since his wife was so devastated by what she saw...well, that should be all the OP needs to know to stop the visits.
Edited 5/18/2004 4:01 pm ET ET by katmandoo2001
I would conspire with my neighbor to keep my daughter out of their home unsupervised, and I would also advise her to probe her to confront him...under the assumption that these are saved pics in self-created folders.
How naive to think that a 15 year old couldn't be seduced by an older man. It's probably MORE common than males being seduced by older women. Females get horny. Get over it already!
Peace.
Scott.
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