Threesome Qquestion

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2004
Threesome Qquestion
9
Tue, 05-18-2004 - 5:12pm
Hi,

First time posting here. OK, well I guess I don't pay to much attention to what goes on around me. Lately I have admitted to myself that I would like to have a threesome FMF.I have mention this to MH a time or two, but I don't think he took me seriously. So I started looking at this board and I see that threesomes are pretty common?! Are threesomes on the rise (more common than what I thought they were) or is it that like always I was not paying attention. By the way I'm only 29

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Tue, 05-18-2004 - 5:18pm
I don't think they're all that common. Depends on what social circles you travel in. If you read all the threads, you will find one thing that is really important and that is to communicate between all parties what and what will not go on. Really important. Plus, I don't know, I like a lot of different sex, but threesomes are not for me. They can get out of control quickly and once you're involved in it, there's no turning back. People can really get their feelings hurt. Just make sure it's something you really, really gotta do!
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Tue, 05-18-2004 - 5:24pm
hi nina....i'm curious what intices a woman to desire a FMF 3some....do you want to have sex with the woman too or just allow your husband to be sexual with her?...do you think you are bi-sexual and have you always been sexually attracted to females?...do you have any idea if your husband might be disappointed to learn you might be bi-sexual (or lesbian) and maybe thats why he is avoiding your proposition?

i have experimented with 3somes and swinging but i preferred MFM (no male sexual contact though)...i'm not interested sexually in women so that 3some fell flat for me.

good luck and hope you get some great advice nina!

honey

    

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Tue, 05-18-2004 - 5:48pm
Hi, I'm not nina, but I think there are quite a few women out there who fantasize in some fashion about what it would feel like being with another woman. I know for myself, I had always fantasized about touching and kissing another woman's breasts and having the favor returned. Anything down below, no. Although I often wondered what it would feel like to have a woman go down on me - gently. So we tried it once. Had it been just that, it would have been a very pleasurable experience, but it turned into something else.

I have thought about seeing this woman again just her and I, but I keep it as a fantasy. Maybe someday it will present itself at the perfect time and I'll just go for it. I'm not planning on it or anything. I don't feel like I'm a lesbian because of that or even bi-sexual. We had a threesome with a special lady who lives closeby and is/was very experienced in such things. When things turned bad, we didn't talk for a long time. Now, we talk and take walks together with our dogs. I think she wouldn't mind getting together with me, without my hubby. I think about it, but like I said, it would have to present itself at a really perfect time and place.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2004
Tue, 05-18-2004 - 5:57pm


Hi, Honey

No I don’t think I’m Bi-sexual. I think I should have answered No I’m not Bi sexual. Seeing other females naked having sex with men (like in Porn) turns me on. But when I think of giving or receiving (with a female) any type of intercourse (oral sex to be included) other than perhaps some breast touching it really turns me off. I don’t think this makes me Bi or lesbian.? The reason I would like an fmf is because I think I would not mind seeing MH with another female (of my choice of course). I would like for this to happen some day, but right know I would not even know where to start even the questions you asked me I had not really thought about. Oh and the reason as to why not a mfm threesome well first I don’t think MH would go for it and second of all I would not know what to do with two men. If you have any more questions please feel free.

nina

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2004
Tue, 05-18-2004 - 6:07pm
Tiana

You took the words right out of my mouth (about they way you feel ). But you also said something about it turning bad. I’m not asking for you to tell me what happened with your threesome but can you give some pointers on how I can prevent it from turning bad??? If you Don’t mine Thanks.

nina

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Tue, 05-18-2004 - 6:15pm
We all sat and talked about what we would like to do, but we didn't set down definite rules and restrictions. Definite, "you can't do that" and "there will be none of ..."

So I think that was our problem. My hubby likes to push for things though and can be very persuasive, but your hubby or SO is probably not like that. Just make sure you all three (3) discuss everything out.

Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 05-18-2004 - 6:45pm
Welcome to the board, Nina. I don't think anything we do nowadays, hasn't always gone on....we just talk more openly about them now. However, I don't think the majority of married couples indulge in threesomes or swinging.

If you decide to go through with the experience, just consider all the risks involved with inviting another person into your relationship, particularly if you are parents.


Edited 5/18/2004 6:48 pm ET ET by katmandoo2001

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2004
Wed, 05-19-2004 - 11:12am
Number one reason things go bad in a threesome is communication. If you have any reservations what so ever, they need to be discussed before hand. Also, if one person gets up and leaves the room, all else stops, and the party is over. IF either partner is having issues, it is done, no further. Wants and desires need to be discussed fully as well, as there are things he may want to do with this woman, that you do not want him to do. Set limits, rules, or boundaries, and then do not cross them. I had a threesome with my best friend and SO. When it was over we had some issues to deal with. Mostly because the communication was not there like it should have been. There are lots of things that can go wrong, but if you are open, stick to the limits, and enjoy it, they can be a lot of fun. I enjoyed it, during, but afterwords had some issues due to the rules not being followed. Hope you are smart, and discuss this fully before going through with it. Either that, or you have absolutely zero jealousy traits whatso ever.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2004
Wed, 05-19-2004 - 3:46pm
Wow that's one lucky dude!but if you do it don't blame him down the line saying stuff like he likes her more than me or you shouldn't have done that, etc remember it's your idea.