Erection problems
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Erection problems
| Thu, 05-27-2004 - 4:14pm |
Hi all, I have a question and hope someone can help me.I'm not saying its this way for sure but just wanted some opinons. I noticed for awhile now, not all the time but sometimes, my husband can not keep an erection. He has no problem getting one but has trouble keeping one. I have done some research on porn because he has a problem with that, and it does state that SOMETIMES the viewing of to much porn can change the chemicals in peoples brains and they begin the think and feel that the human flesh doesn't do alot for them, because of the amount of porn being viewed. They become dependent on that to keep them aroused. I'm sure there may be other causes as well, not sure what. He is 34 years old and seems to be in pretty good shape. So i don't know if its a medical issue or not. He tells me when this happens that he thinks he's trying to hard. That may very well be the case too. However, I was just wondering if anyone else knows what it may be. Thanks.
Hugs to all!
firefly

Porn is fantasy and fantasy is all about the fantasizer. In a normal sexual exchange, some of the attention and time is given to the partner so it's possible that he is unable to keep his erection because he isn't being stimulated 100% of the time but devoting some of that time to you. I hope.
IF he's spending too much time viewing and masturbating to porn, then he will train himself to respond to certain things and to certain stimuli. IF he has a problem and it's hurting your sex life, then he should seek counseling.
But it's quite possible that he has a blood flow problem, too. Not likely at his age, but possible. He should get a checkup with his urologist to be sure.
AND last but not least, he actually COULD be causing his erectile dysfunction because of anxiety and worry over not functioning.
Talk with him...ask him to cut back on the porn to see if that helps and ask him to make an appt. with the dr. If he is unable to cut back on his porn use, or unwilling, then he may have a real dependence on it and that will require professional counseling to overcome..
Hope you find the help you need. My DH's problem was a real strain on our marriage, especailly just starting out like we were. I thought I was the problem for a long while. Once we found out that it really was him and that it was something that we could fix I was much better able to be supportive and am even able to help him not be so self-conscious about the whole thing. It's still a problem now and then, but we can deal with it a lot better now because we know it's a temoporary thing.
I do know, too, that porn will eat a hole in a relationship faster than a bowl weavel on a cotton bowl, so I do hope that you encourage him to get help for his sexual addiction issues. (Yes, that's what a porn habit is, a sexual addiction.) I am a social worker and sadly see the effects of this addiction on families and children every day.
Good luck!
Patience77
Hugs to you!
firefly