Thinking about sex all the time

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-10-2004
Thinking about sex all the time
5
Thu, 06-10-2004 - 3:25pm
Hi there. My SO and I have a wonderful sex life, but we only have sex about four times a week, sometimes less, sometimes more. We are both very happy and compatible. In my past, all of my SO's always managed to somehow swing everything back to sex. It was always groping, talking, innuendos; "Let's shop for this." "Let's try that." "You wear this." Sex was the forefront of relationship. My SO of almost a year is nothing like any of them, and I find myself more relaxed and comfortable with him, than any of them. Is this simply maturity, or is it just him that's different? I'm 23 and he's 24. Don't get me wrong, I love sex, but I don't want it to be the whole relationship.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-03-2003
Thu, 06-10-2004 - 4:25pm
Hey there. . .

This is just my two cents:

I think that you and your SO have a very sexually healthy relationship, and that's great. It's also wonderful that sex isn't at the forefront of your relationship. I think that it's a HUGE sign of maturity for both of you. You're 23 and 24. . . I'm sure that MOST of your past relationships have been about sex, because, well, that's how guys are at that age. Hell, that's how a lot of guys are FOREVER. But, it's a great thing that you've found someone who wants you for more than your sexual abilities, which, of course are just an added bonus to the wonderful personality, heart and charm that brought him to you in the first place. Way to go, and congratulations!

-Mo

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2004
Fri, 06-11-2004 - 10:09am
That shows both signs of maturity and that this relationship is stronger than your past relationships. Although sex and having a healthy sexual relationship is important, sex should not be at the forefront of any relationship, or the whole relationship for that matter. Life does not revolve around sex, sex revolves around life and when it is right and comfortalbe for BOTH parties. He may also have something to do with it in the fact that he doesn't think about sex all the time. Wait, what am I saying? All guys think about sex a lot, he just may have the common knowledge to know when it is right and comfortable for you to do it and talk about it and when it isn't. If I were you I would just smile and be happy that I found a guy that I am so compatable with, sexually and non-sexually.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2003
Fri, 06-11-2004 - 10:35am
Dear FF,

Yes honey...this is a sign of maturity. Sex is part of a healthy relationship, but only part. Friendship, love, kindness, respect and the ability to be together when you're doing nothing at all are all qualities that are equally important (if not more) to the success of a relationship. Good sex is the by product not the cause of all of the above.

Peace and blessings to you both!

Scott.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2003
Fri, 06-11-2004 - 11:04am
There is nothing wrong with either thinking about and having loving times with the one you love. It bring you closer together, especially when you chat about it either before and or after.

Get the most out of what you like the best, share it with the one you love and share all your experiances, your fantacies and love with one another.

It is a rare blessing to find a partner that shares this with you, to find someone who knows and feels the same way you do is to be as compatitable as you are is a real pleasure.

Make the most of it as once you have had a child it may well change, all I will add is, be open and honest and be together.

And if you are told by others it is not normal, they mean, They would not do that, so what, if you want to be happy, you get on with it and never mind what others say.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Fri, 06-11-2004 - 11:59am

Yes, it is a sign of maturity.


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