Fat Husbands

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-14-2004
Fat Husbands
12
Mon, 06-14-2004 - 3:06pm
First of all high this is my first post - be kind to me...PLEASE! I have been with my good wife for some 16 years now and in the past 2 or so years i have put on a few (?) pounds. Strangley our sex life has never been better, but i want to know if you ladies find it a turn off if your man puts on a bit of weight. I ask because i think that my wife wants me to lose a few pounds (she has started serving me green stuff). Your thoughts are appreciated. Jim

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Mon, 06-14-2004 - 3:12pm
I'll be nice to you. Don't feel bad. People go up and down in their weight all throughout life. As long as your sex life is still going strong and you're both happy and satisfied with it! Although I think most couples like their SO's to be as fit as they can be. Lets face it, manuverving all those positions works a whole lot better when you are lean and fit! And why not try and lose a couple of lbs? It will make you feel better and be healthier for you too! Sounds like you have a very loving and caring wife! For not "sounding" you on some extra weight gain and just lovingly beginning to serve you more "greens". No worries!
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2004
Mon, 06-14-2004 - 3:18pm
LOL - she has started serving me green stuff - sorry, I just got a kick out of that. When I got together with JT, he was extremely fit and I absolutely LOVED his toned, athletic body. But as three years have passed and he no longer plays any sports, he has put on a few pounds...and I love that too! I like being able to grab onto something when we are making love when he is thrusting his hips into me, whether I am controlling how fast he is going or if it is just that romantic and intense and I need to feel his every body movement. He complains about missing his old body but he doesn't do anything to improve it either - I think because I have voiced my opinion about liking the way he is now, he thinks I like him better now than he was before. WHen really, I couldn't pick between the two. Maybe your wife is like me, but she is just also concerned for your health. I mean, it's ok to be a bit overweight, but just don't eat way unhealthy too. Talk to her about it and see where she is coming from. Because if your sex life is definatley NOT lacking, maybe that's all it is, she's concerned for the both of you all's well being overall. Just my two cents!
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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-14-2004
Mon, 06-14-2004 - 3:34pm
All that talk of holdin on to things and thrusting has embarresed me a bit. My poor wife needs to hold on, especially if she is on top because if she falls of she could end up in hospital...it's a long way to drop. i guess it might be more of an issue for me as i am starting to feel unattractive...i don't like her to see me in my birthday suit. I have also found that i am finding it harder (no pun intended) to "last the distance" as i am getting tired and sweaty way to quick. On the other hand it's the only exercise i get........
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Mon, 06-14-2004 - 3:56pm
Start walking and eating those greens if it is affecting your sex life. I thought you said it was better than ever?
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2004
Mon, 06-14-2004 - 4:00pm
I agree that if your sex life is still great, then I doubt she is any less attracted to you. She may even be serving you greens because of *her* health, it's easier to eat healthy when everyone eats healthy. You don't need to be skinny to have great sex, I had great sex even when I was 9 months pregnant so that has nothing to do with it ;o) My DH has put on some weight, but I honestly don't care. I think it's cute but it bothers him. It's nice to cuddle him, and when we are laying together I like to rub his stomach :o) Not everyone likes a lean body. I like some muscle, but I don't like really lean muscle. Ever see the ads on TV for this guy? http://muscleweb.com/john/ I don't like how he looks LOL. And don't get me started on how gross I think body builders look ;o) Your wife sounds plenty happy with you, ny guess is she's more concerned with your health then how you look :o)

Leticia


Edited 6/14/2004 4:01 pm ET ET by yarn_lover

Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 06-14-2004 - 4:12pm
I think your wife just wants a HEALTHY husband! She may think that she can help you stay that way by providing nutricious and less fattening meals for you. A trimmer man is usually a healthier one, less likely to have a heart attack or stroke, especially as you get older. It's also important to exercise every day to stay healthy, not just trim. But that can be a daily swim or just choosing the stairs instead of the elevator...whatever gets your heart rate up.

I think after a certain point, one's physicality has less to do with the attraction you feel for one another, than the history, personal bond and intimacy you share. At least, that's the way my DH and I look at it. We all age, our bodies change with time, but who we are INSIDE will always remain the same.


Edited 6/14/2004 6:35 pm ET ET by katmandoo2001

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Mon, 06-14-2004 - 5:20pm

Hi Jim,


My husband was always up and down with his weight for the past 24 yrs and no, it has never been a turn-off for me.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-21-2003
Mon, 06-14-2004 - 5:27pm
Maybe she serves you green stuff because she wants you both to eat healthier.

My DH is overweight. I know it...he knows it. I love him no matter what. I just married him a month ago and he was this way when I met him over a year ago. He's aware that he needs to exercise and try to eat healthy, but it's not up to me to change him. I love him and I will accept him however he is. I just want him to be happy. If he's happy at his current weight, I'm happy. Sex is never bad...it's wonderful and he's the best thing that ever happened to me in every way.

Melissa

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-14-2004
Mon, 06-14-2004 - 6:36pm
Never knew so many of you had large hubbies :). I think over-all it is my health that Dawn is worried about...maybe i do drink to much beer and eat to many cakes... I PROMISE THAT TOMMOROW I WILL DIET ...honest!! anyway here in the UK it is bed time so i will sneak my 200g bar of dairy milk under my pillow and after performing my husbandly duties (i hope) i will wait till she is sleeping and have a wee nibble before falling asleep.

God bless you all

Jim
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-03-2004
Mon, 06-14-2004 - 7:00pm
Hello!

I love that you posted this!... first i should say that my bf is 6'5" and well i dont know what he weighs but he wears a 2XLT, hes a big big guy!... and i love him just as much for it... did you ever think that maybe shes not worried about your appearance so much as your health?... my bf lost 45lbs this year and seemed adament about it then stopped trying so i suggested that him and i walk together and that we make it a plan to eat salads at least once a week.. he too felt like i was pushing him to be skinnier... but thats not it... not saying that a tall dark and hansom guy isn't on the list but its not important....think of it this way.. your heart is the same size as that of a small person.. both height and weight... your heart has to support alot more of you the more overweight you get... since you have been your height all your life that automatically drops out so you just have the weight.... if my bf gained weight i wouldn't love him any less... but to me it is a healt issue.. this year i dropped from 195 to 165... i lost about 20lbs on my own and the rest was from getting mono... (i lost thoes 10 lbs in about 2 days) so heres how i say think of it... if you were to go on walks and eat that (perfectly edible) green stuff with your wife... you could litterally have a few more years with her in the end?....so ask yourself.. is a few more years worth it?... anyways... im a human biology major in college, so please take what i said seriously...weight is a big stress on your body... (by the way... sex mostly orgasms, can/will give you more energy... ATP so you might want to mention that after one of your fav... non-green, meals!... hehe) thats a fact... your drained of energy initially but in the end its worth it....

well im stopping now.. if i've helped or want to know more please e-mail me... traciwarnock@hotmail.com

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