Slut in the bedroom??

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-10-2004
Slut in the bedroom??
142
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 3:10pm
A man on another post said that all men want a slut in the bedroom. I've always heard this growing up too. Isn't a slut a woman who is dirty and services men? The dictionary definition is:

A woman considered sexually promiscuous.

A woman prostitute.

A slovenly woman; a slattern

All negative, IMO.

I love and enjoy sex to it's fullest potential. Considering the fact that this is the twenty-first century, I think that it's about over due that we come up with a better associated word other than "slut" for a women who enjoys sex(particularly sex within a monogomous relationship). It's very offensive that women who enjoy sex are compared with a person who has little or no self-respect and who is most likely not respected by the men she's having sex with.

Additionally, not all women have to act like sluts(servicing men). I believe that a woman can be extremely sexy and sexual just by being themselves. Which may be the furthest thing from being slutty. It may be she has a sweet, natural, demeaner.






Edited 6/15/2004 4:19 pm ET ET by franciesfancy

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2004
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 3:17pm
I agree. How about a new word that just means "high sex drive"? There is nothing wrong with a woman who enjoys sex A LOT, especially if they are in a monogomous relationship. It seems though that many people still have the "everybody does it, just no one talks about it" mentality. Which I think is somewhat wrong. A good, healthy sex life and sex drive is one factor in haveing a successful relationship, so why label those women who freely express how happy they are to have meaningful sex with their loved one?
Image hosting by Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2004
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 3:18pm
As the man who made the comment I will say this to help clarify. I have never viewed the word slut as a bad thing. Men want a woman who is uninhibited, very sexual, and iopen in the bedroom. That to me, doesn't necessarily make her a slut, b ut the word is slang, and used in many ways. Women sitting around with there friends will call another a slut, and they all laugh about it. It is a figure of speach my dear, and while it may not be to everyones liking, it is still the truth. No one wants a house wife in the bedrrom. They want a slut. Someone who is willing, able, and ready to do anything they desire. ie a slut.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-10-2004
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 3:22pm
I edited my post to include something along these lines. Why does a woman have to "act" slutty or like a slut to be the "best" in bed? Can't a woman act classy and sweet, and still be sexy and horny? There's some undertone that women have to act a certain way in order for a man to think she loves sex. Why can't she just be herself?


Edited 6/15/2004 4:09 pm ET ET by franciesfancy
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2004
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 3:29pm
I don't view slut as anything more than an expression. But then again I am not a PC person either. If you are a B word, I am gonna call you one. If you are short and fat, I will tell you your short and fat. I want a slut in my bedroom. I want a woman who has no inhibitions when it comes to sex with me. Slut is not a label, it is an expression. All men are pigs right? Or pricks, or whatever else we can call men. I am a man, and I know men are not the most easy creatures on the planet to deal with, but, neither are women. If you love sex, want sex, and need sex, then you are a slut in the bedroom. You can be miss proper out in town all you want to, and be completely monogomous in your relationships. But, if you crave it, then you are it. There is no offense meant by this. My SO is my little slut, and I love it. If you are so wrapped up in the word slut, then IMHO you got issues with your self image, self esteem, or your beliefs. It is not a bad thing to be a "slut in the bedroom". It is a good thing!!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 3:31pm
The old saying that "Men want a lady in their social circle and a freak in the bedroom" runs true!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2004
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 3:33pm
TIANA, nicely done. Another way to say the exact same thing!!!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 3:33pm
Another new term for slut now a days is ho and it's not just for a certain race either. It's used in general. I hear that more than slut actually. Of course I have a teenage daughter who keeps me up on the latest, lol.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-10-2004
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 3:40pm
Wouldn't that be akin to calling your hubby a "bum" even if he works hard?

There's no doubt that sluts are women who are willing, ready, and able to do anything that a man desires, but those women "service" men, in fact, any man, indescretionally. They also don't get serviced or even respected. I understand that it's a word easily thrown around and shouldn't be taken literally, but I just think that women have evolved and they enjoy receiving as much as giving. I didn't mean to get you rowled up, just making an observation. I don't find the word offensive(because I know it's mostly said in jest), I just find that it would be nice to find a more respectable word to describe women who enjoy sex.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2004
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 3:54pm
I see what you are saying and totally agree. I just think that slut is more often used again women and suggests that they sleep around and is used in the sense that if a woman is called a slut, she would sleep with a guy just for a cigarette. That's how I view that owrd slut, along with being called easy and the likes. When you put it into the terms like you did, I have no problem with it. And to be honest, I did have serious self esteem issues but that was for a totally different reason and I got help for it. That may also be why I have such a problem with being called a slut - my past has been thrown in my face a lot and it wasn't my fault. But some people can't understand that and would rather label people or jusge them instead of trying to dig deeper into the cause. It's easier that way for some people.
Image hosting by Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-10-2004
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 3:54pm
Just thought it would be a good topic of conversation. Why is it either/or? A slut or frigid? Why can't a woman be unhibited and not be a slut or slutty? That's the point.

Pages