men, masturbation and sex drive
Find a Conversation
men, masturbation and sex drive
| Tue, 09-28-2004 - 3:17pm |
wow, i havent' been here in a while, but i have a quick question i hope someone could answer. My BF just told me he hasn't masturbated in a LONG time because he learned in high school that it lowers your sex drive. I knew already that naturally men can't keep having erections/orgasms immediately over and over, but it seemed like he meant it was a long-term effect of masturbation, and i never heard of that, i just wondered if anyone knew if that was true. Is it also possible that NOT masturbating could actually lower sex drive, because he's been having problems in that area for almost a year now, and i wondered if that might be a cause instead of what he was saying about benefits of not masturbating. If anyone has any insights, they would be appreciated! thanks!

Pages
Maybe he is embarrassed to admit that he masturbates??
Perhaps you should point out that this theory obviously is having the opposite effect on HIM, so maybe he should start "priming the pump" again.
He may need to talk with his dr. too. He could be depressed or have some other underlying condition.
You say he has "problems" in that area? What kind of problems? Lack of interest, or erection problems? Lack of interest could be due to low hormone levels. It could also be the result of problems outside the bedroom. Erection problems could be due to medications he's taking, or stress, or depression, or medical problems such as diabetes or other vascular problems.
If he's had a sudden drop in interest.......maybe he should see a doctor, an Urologist, who specializes in sexual problems. Talk to him, and express your concern about his health. Have him get a check up, and if everything checks out ok, then there's something emotional going on.
It's also possible, as one poster stated, that he IS masturbating on a regular basis, but because of his "beliefs" isn't admitting it. If he's going at it too much, that certainly could be a reason that he's not interested in partner sex.
oh, some of you mentioned that maybe he was just not admitting that he masturbates, which was a good point, but he's very open-minded about sex in general and not really embarrassed about anything, so i really doubt that was the case.
Instead of giving you my two cents on it, I'll simply say that I agree with the views of Michael Ra Bouchard, M.A., Ph.D., member of the American College of Sexology and the Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality.
Basically what I learned from his words is that each of us has our own individual "normal" sexual frequencies, frequencies that differ from person to person. This includes masturbation. If he's been doing something that keeps him within his sexual normality, whether solo or with a partner, then the good doctor didn't seem to express concern. Only concern I learned from him was when changes were made that went outside that normal range that varies with each individual.
Basically I viewed his advice as not to worry about it unless you notice negative affects. I would guess these affects would include either increased need or more of a lack of it all together. In fact, there's a web page by Dr. Newman K. Lin, Ph.D., PE, that discusses his views, in detail, regarding the symptoms of possible over-masturbation:
"Over-ejaculation melts down the acetylcholine/parasympathetic nervous functions...it causes the brain and adrenal functions to perform excessive dopamine-norepinephrine-epinephrine conversion and turn the brain and body functions to be extremely sympathetic. It results in the brain's and nervous dysfunctions, stress, anxiety, impatience, eye floaters or fuzzy vision, buzzing (noisy) ears, cardiovascular irregularities, urinary incontinence..."
Because Dr. Lin's sight does sell products, I don't believe I'm permitted to provide the link while posting, but you can look him up for yourself and check out the section on masturbation.
Hope this helps. Here's the link to Dr. Bouchard's article:
http://www.ivillage.com/relationships/experts/sexpro/qas/0,,189265_257710,00.html
C h a r a c t e r
above all else
Mr. Para
C H A R A C T E R
Pages