Why can't I find my G-spot?
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Why can't I find my G-spot?
| Sun, 10-16-2005 - 12:26am |
I've read many things about where the G-spot is located in the body, but whenever I try to find it myself, I don't really feel anything pleasurable. It simply feels like my fingers are inside me. Clitoral stimulation has been the only thing that works for me. In the past, I had a boyfriend that would finger me because he wanted to, but it never did anything for me. It always made me feel like I had to pee (another comment I've seen a lot of on these boards). I'm still a virgin, but I've been thinking of losing my virginity to my current boyfriend. Yet I'm worried that it won't be pleasurable because it's as if the G-spot doesn't exist for me :P How can I find this elusive area for myself? And how should I tell my current boyfriend to stimulate it so that it actually feels good? Thanks for your help.

Losing your virginity and finding your "g" spot have nothing to do with each other. Many people haven't found it, some people even say it doesn't exist, but that has nothing to do with having pleasure or not having pleasure.
You know where the important part is, and that's your clitoris. That is where the pleasure originates. Even during intercourse, most of us need clitoral stimulation for maximum pleasure. Eventually you or he might find the "g" spot, and so much the better, but many women have gotten along just fine without ever finding it.
Also, just "feeling around" when you're not aroused, you might not recognize the area. Don't worry about it....concentrate on pleasure, no matter where it's coming from.
Just as an FYI.....it's located directly behind the clitoris, on the anterior wall of your vagina.......think of the clitoris as a tree, and the "g" spot as it's roots. It's not a "raised bump"......it's just an area of the vagina.
>>Yet I'm worried that it won't be pleasurable because it's as if the G-spot doesn't exist for me :P <<
You know, I really, really wouldn't worry about it. OK, so I'm a guy so my advice may not be the most accurate, but I honestly think that the G-spot is the most overrated and over-hyped thing in existance. Heck, half the women that have tried to find it don't even think that it exists - I mean, if it WAS actually there, how hard can it be to find it? I've been with a number of women and to the best of my knowledge not one of them were worried about their "G spot" and most certainly seemed to enjoy sex without it.
Personally I don't think that it exists. I don't believe that there is a magic "spot" that deserves it's own name and all the attention that the "G-Spot" gets. I think that it's probably just a part of the vagina where stimulation sometimes and with some women feels nice because it's putting pressure on the clitoris from the "inside". It's like saying that you've got a "B" spot between your shoulders because a back massage feels good! There's no spot, it just happens that a back massage feels good.
So, I think that you should forget about it and not worry about it. Honestly it's the biggest piece of misinformation around. If you didn't know that it existed your sex life would be just fine; but now that you can't find it you feel that you are missing out on something.
If clitoral stimulation works for you, why spend your time worrying about the stimulation that isn't? The more you let it concern you, the less likely it is to happen. I was with someone for four years that couldn't find that spot, but could give great clitoral stimulation. Now I've found someone that can combine the two. But until I met him I didn't know what I was missing out on, so it didn't concern me.
And that peeing sensation is often part of the sensation we feel when our g-spots are stimulated. If you don't let it annoy you so much, then you might get to the pleasurable part. If you go to the toilet before sex, then you will know you definitely don't need to go to the toilet, and will know that the feeling of needing to pee is just part of the process.
Not being a woman, I can't tell you how to find it yourself. However, I found it on every woman I was ever with, even before it was named. I actually felt sort of cheated of recognition because I was using it before the information was published on it.
Actually, it always seemed further up than directly under the clitoris (though I always thought they were related), more like it was centered beneath the mons veneris. And I always felt some sort of a small spot there with my finger, which was how I could manage to concentrate on it.
Is it overhyped? I don't think so. The women that I was with seemed to prefer it to almost anything else. None of which helps you or answers your question. I would say that if you are a virgin, that you should take things slowly. It seems to me that a lot of young men don't seem to have the patience to find that special spot. My last girl friend had way more lovers than I ever did, was over 40 years old and she nearly melted when I touched her there for the first time. Okay, that doesn't help you, either.
Please, just be patient. I have never heard of women finding the spot for themselves. Maybe it's like tickling, you can't do it to yourself? I don't know. Or maybe your finger isn't long enough. Like I say, I'm not a woman, so I don't know. Please, just give it time and enjoy what you have available.