tight?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-11-2005
tight?
2
Sun, 10-23-2005 - 11:08am
Usually when my boyfriend fingers me by the end, he ends up fitting in 3 or 4 fingers comfortably, but yesterday I felt really tight and even 1 finger was enough. Why did this happen? It worries me because we will be having sex for the first time soon, and if it felt tight with only 1 finger, how will I be able to fit his penis?
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2005
In reply to: nicole_norch
Sun, 10-23-2005 - 12:07pm

Being "tight" is usually caused by one of two things. 1) Lack of foreplay and arousal. 2) Nervousness.

Being willing doesn't mean you're properly aroused and/or lubricated. Without that, it's going to be tight, and painful. Arousal comes from foreplay, oral or manual, with lots of attention to the clitoris, which is your real sexual organ, not your vagina. Also, your vagina doesn't stretch permanently, either from fingers, toys or intercourse. It's tight until it's relaxed, and then when you're done, it goes right back to being tight. So, just because you're relaxed this time is no guarantee that you will be the next time. Every time is the same, you have to have the foreplay to relax you, and get you aroused and well lubricated. When you're more experienced, it will be easier, because you'll be "mentally" relaxed before you even start.

Did he skip foreplay this time? If so, that's the problem. Also, if you're thinking of having intercourse, that will make you nervous. Again, you might be willing, but are you really "ready" for that step? Are you fully informed about birth control, or are you scared that you might get pregnant? Are you ON any kind of birth control? If you think you're ready to do it, you have to be ready to accept the responsibility of what you're doing, and understand the consequences if you're not protected.

First time intercourse doesn't have to be painful, but if you (AND your partner) don't understand the importance of foreplay and relaxation, it can be painful, and probably will be.

For more information on how your body works, and what you need to do to prepare for intercourse, both of you should check out www.the-clitoris.com

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2005
In reply to: nicole_norch
Wed, 10-26-2005 - 3:48pm
i havent seen one yet that wont adjust to the size of the penis. because im small and it always works