Birth Control vs. Condom

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-24-2005
Birth Control vs. Condom
10
Mon, 10-24-2005 - 7:11pm
Okay I have another question, although I am not ready to have intercourse yet, I have begun to think about when I am ready and what precautions I will take. My bf is VERY against condoms. He says that it takes a lot out of the experience for him. When we do start having intercourse he has asked that I take Birth Control Pills. My question is as follows, since BCP protects against pregnancy and nothing else, should I be worried about having unprotected sex against STD's, and all other sexually transmitted diseases even if I know exactly who his previous sexual partners were? Obviously his sleeping with those other girls made it so he was getting anything anyone else THEY had ever slept with had, so what do I do?
Also, a side question, to any men who want to answer this (or women who know from their men), how significant is the with vs. without a condom experience? Isn't dealing with BCP such a bigger hassel? Is it worth it?
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Mon, 10-24-2005 - 8:44pm

If your b/f has been sexually active with other women, he should be tested for STDs and then tested again in 6 months.


bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2005
Mon, 10-24-2005 - 8:52pm
First, as to your subject line, in my opinion, condoms ARE a form of birth control. Now then, I would certainly be concerned about getting STD's from my SO regardless of who she slept with as it is possible to contract STD's and not even know it. I would seriously suggest you ask your bf to have STD testing done to insure your safety. Don't rely solely on his word. Not that he may lie, but does anyone really know another person's sex life? Are you that intimate with his ex's sex lives that you would take a chance with your own life??
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-19-2001
Tue, 10-25-2005 - 5:45am

You should both be tested and both of you must commit to one another if you are "clean". Otherwise, you risk (both) infecting the other if you have any other partners who don't use condoms.

As far as sensation and experience, I HATED condoms. I liken it to petting a cat with rubber gloves on. However, if I/C is not long enough, they can prolong it.

Good luck.

Osusguy
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2005
Tue, 10-25-2005 - 8:57am

How about birth control AND condom? As someone else mentioned, they are both birth control. Female birth control is more effective, and isn't that much of a "hassle" when you think about how much "hassle" an unwanted pregnancy would be. There are many other kinds of b/c besides just the pill.

Lots of men don't like condoms. They say it's like taking a bath with a raincoat, and other things like that, and I can understand it must dull the sensations some. BUT, unless they've been tested, there is no way you can know whether or not they have any one of many STD's. Most of them give men NO symptoms. There are no symptoms from HIV! You can't tell by looking, only by testing. If he does't like them, then he's had sex with other women without a condom, and it's very possible that he could be carrying some kind of virus or bacteria that could infect you. He could give you some things that would give YOU no symptoms, and you wouldn't know you had them until you had a checkup with bloodwork. Some are cureable, but many are NOT! Until he's been tested, your "saying" should be "no glove, no love"!

Congratulations for "thinking" about these things in advance, because it's YOUR body, and your health, and your life. If he wants to be with you badly enough, he WILL use condoms until he can prove by testing that he has no diseases or infections that he can spread to you. If he can't do that for you, then his motives are purely selfish.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2005
Tue, 10-25-2005 - 1:19pm
i woill have to say dollysface it is night and day to me with condoms. i cum alot quicker w/out condoms because of senstivity but you have to think about B/C also. i would say your intercourse would be more enjoyable w/out condoms
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-22-2005
Tue, 10-25-2005 - 5:02pm

<>

I disagree with you. No one is 100% free of STD risk whether you are married or single. Many wives have contracted diseases from unfaithful husbands. I'm not saying your husband is unfaithful but all it takes is one time of unprotected sex with an infected partner. Abstinence is the only way to be 100% risk free of STD's since we know you can still get STD's with condom use.

BABY #3!!
 
Pregnancy ticker
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Tue, 10-25-2005 - 5:57pm
Well yes, you are right that no one is 100% STD risk free if there is a cheating partner even if it's a one time deal.

bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-01-2005
Tue, 10-25-2005 - 7:24pm
If he doesn't want to use condoms, tell him to get tested and show you the results. He should take some of the responsibility for birth control. If he complains, tell him it's either that or use condoms. I know when my bf and I have used condoms, he lasts longer so I guess that means the sensation is not as strong. BCP isn't bad. It takes some getting used to at first, but after a while it's so routine that I've had issues w/ remembering if I took it after I've taken it. Anyways, I've used both methods, so feel free to ask if you have any questions.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-24-2005
Tue, 10-25-2005 - 8:20pm
Again thank you for all of your replies!
As for him having been sexually active before, I never even THOUGHT to ask what type of protection they used then! I will definitely have to do that now! As for being tested, I will ask for that now too!
Also, thanks to everyone who gave input into whether or not condoms makes the experience any different. It's good to know that its not only my guy who doesn't like to wear them!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Tue, 10-25-2005 - 9:35pm
You should insist that he get tested.

bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd