Can't have an orgasm and not attracted..

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-29-2007
Can't have an orgasm and not attracted..
2
Thu, 08-30-2007 - 3:53am
I'm no longer attracted to my husband. We have been through a lot in the 4 years we have been married (him cheating, lying) etc. We are going to marriage counseling and are working on getting things back to normal but whenever we have sex I am unable to achieve orgasm. We used to have sex at least three times a week and now we let weeks go by w/o it. He is always in the mood but I am not. I have the desire to have sex but its not when he is around. I know I am rambling now. I'm so frustrated please help!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2007
Thu, 08-30-2007 - 7:21am

Welcome to the board jnd7204.

I'm sure that even with counseling, it will take time for you to stop feeling hurt about your hubby lying and having an affair. So much about being attracted to a person can have to do with how you feel about the person. Since you don't have trust in your DH right now, that is affecting your enjoyment of sex with him.

Have you mentioned this to your counselor? The more issues you bring up there, the more he/she can address them and help you deal with them both individually and as a couple. If you can move past the things that have happened in your relationship, then the two of you an start to rebuild something together, which should also have a positive impact on your sexual relations.



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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2006
Thu, 08-30-2007 - 9:14am

If you're angry or upset with him, it's logical that you don't enjoy sex with him. That's what you're going to counseling for.....and that's what needs to be fixed.