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| Mon, 09-10-2007 - 2:33pm |
i just have a question. me and DH have to put a towel underneath whenever we have sex because just after it's complete, some of him comes back out of me. Well, it's probably a bit of him and a bit of the ky. but it's a mix, and it basically spills out of me if i try to move. and like a waterfall if he orgasms while i'm on top. is this normal? i think i read somewhere that it maybe just because i'm smaller inside and can't hold as much of his seamen? but i'm afraid this means we could never be spontaneous and have sex anywhere in our apartment, because we'd always have to make sure we can quickly access an old towel from the linen closet (in the bedroom, i literally keep one in my bedside table). is this normal, or are we maybe just being too overobsessed with keeping everything clean? can you easily clean it up if it were to get on, say, the carpet or the couch?

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As the others have said, it's natural to leak after sex. There's no where for the fluids to go, so they have to come out. You can try practicing with your kegels. If you're not familiar with doing kegel exercises, here's a post on them. I find the better toned my kegel muscles are, the more I'm able to use them to hold the liquid in until I reach the bathroom.
Depending on the type of furniture you have, you might choose to use a towel to protect it. Your body fluids and the water based lubes are cleanable, but not all fabrics are easily cleaned.
haha, well it's good to know we're only normal and that it happens to most also,
umm i'd say the carpet is your normal, run of the mill rented-apartment-carpet. and the couch is... oh i don't know. i guess some kind of canvasy material? that's not the right term, i'm sure, but maybe you get the gist of it. just in case we do wanna be more "hey let's do it right here right now" (which would be amazing), what kind of cleaner do you use to get something like that out?
and yes, i guess i could also work on those kegel muscles, see if that helps us out. i think i was probably close to figuring that out, because a couple of times i have been able to feel that it's in there, but clenched something (perhaps those muscles, haha!) and got to the bathroom.
also, random, i haven't had an orgasm yet, we've been married for 1 month, and i haven't yet. should i be concerned? and also with that, i have kind of become pretty obsessed with making sure i run to the bathroom before we have sex (just in case i do orgasm) because i've heard that some girls when they do orgasm pee a little bit. should i also relax about going to the bathroom every single time beforehand?
ps, in case you can't already tell, i'm pretty new to this whole "sex" thing. we waited until marriage, and we're both each others' first :c) it was great being able to give ourselves fully to each other, but it also means we both have a heck of a lot of learning to do, that's for sure!!
I think soap and a mild detergent will clean the fabric fine as long as you can get it wet and scrub it a little. What you might want to try is cleaning a similar type of fabric, held taught, and scrubbed like you might do on your couch. This will help you determine the best way to clean it. Products like carpet cleaner also work amazingly well on fabric furniture.
I don't think you should be concerned at all about having an orgasm. Many women don't have orgasms during intercourse, and many others take years to get to that point. It's just different for women. Your head has to be in the game, but if you think about it too much, it's counterproductive. Just be sure you're relaxed, and concentrate on the pleasure of what you feel.
It sounds like the two of you are having fun learning together. A great website you can check out is www.the-clitoris.com. It tells about the female anatomy and how it reacts to stimulation.
Also, stick around here. Reading the threads and asking questions can be a completely unique learning experience!
It happens to me too and yes I'm also new to the sex thing so I was wondering the same! Actually for me it continues to come out every now and then for a few hours afterwards which is really annoying so I have to put in some undie protection! Now tell me, is THAT normal??
He's had to be more careful now about just pulling out and disappearing to the bathroom as he used to after making a few "wet spots" around the place.
""ps, in case you can't already tell, i'm pretty new to this whole "sex" thing. we waited until marriage, and we're both each others' first :c) it was great being able to give ourselves fully to each other, but it also means we both have a heck of a lot of learning to do, that's for sure!!""
Nothing to be shamed of there, you both get to learn as you go along, there are no expectations, no feelings or not being able to perform like the previous one..you learn as you go and have fun with it.
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