i have a problem... please help
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i have a problem... please help
| Mon, 03-10-2008 - 1:14am |
ok so i have been going out with my girlfriend for about 7 months and we recently started having sex. we were both virgins. i understand that it might hurt her for the first couple of times but she says it still really hurts when we first start and sometimes she will feel a little discomfort throughout intercourse. she says it doesnt hurt enough to be distracted except at the beginning.. i feel kinda bad because it doesnt hurt me yet i dont know what to do to make it not hurt for her anymore. i think theres plenty of foreplay and we use lube if there is some around but she says it still hurts quite a bit. is there anything else we could do so it doesnt hurt her anymore? i dont want to sound full of myself but could i be too big? any different positions or anything? any help would be appreciated... thanks

Welcome to the board, Jim.
If you're sure she's properly aroused and well lubricated, then her vagina should be able to open up to receive any size penis without pain. Some positions do cause the vagina to tilt in different directions or elongate a bit more, but that doesn't sound like it's the problem you are experiencing. If you're thick, then you may have to enter her a bit more slowly, giving her time to adjust a little at a time.
Pain can also be a sign that she has some medical issues. You might want to share the articles I listed below with her. If she thinks she's having any type of medical problem, she should see her gyn and let him/her know what's going on.
Sexual Pain
http://pain.health.ivillage.com/chestabdomenpelvicpain/sexualpain.cfm
Why is Sex Painful?
http://health.ivillage.com/sexualhealth/sxarousal/0,,pscp,00.html
Painful Sex: Causes and Cures
http://health.ivillage.com/sexualhealth/sxarousal/0,,3frw,00.html
Sex: What is Causing Discomfort During Intercourse?
http://health.ivillage.com/sexualhealth/sxarousal/0,,77m5,00.html
Not Quite Engaged ~ Breaking Up is Hard To Do
... Does SIZE Matter? ...
I read someone's suggestion about using Astroglide, and then I realized what you'd said about using lubricants.
Can you elaborate on what is hurting her?
Not Quite Engaged ~ Breaking Up is Hard To Do
Do you think All Men Masturbate?
have you tried woman on top positioning...that way she controls penetration...also might want to try slipping in a few fingers at first...see if that hurts at all.
There is no time frame that is set for people .... she needs to listen to HER body. If she hurts, then she shouldn't be engaging. If it's a tear, she'll most likely feel burning/stinging when she urinates too.
She's really the only person who can determine if she's healed and the pain is gone.
Not Quite Engaged ~ Breaking Up is Hard To Do
Do you think All Men Masturbate?