Using a strap on, on your man!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2004
Using a strap on, on your man!
6
Sat, 09-20-2008 - 8:40am

Has anyone ever done this before? I want my husband to try this, I find it very exciting, the thought of being in charge and dominant, but he is not as comfortable with it. He believe it's an exit only kind of deal. Is there any good reasons I can get him to think about trying this and what is a good strap on to use for both our pleasures?


Nothing ventured, Nothing Gained
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2004
Sat, 09-20-2008 - 9:22am

If your husband believes it's an exit only deal, you wanting to go right into using a strap-on on him IMO

Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2007
Sat, 09-20-2008 - 10:04am
Welcome to the board, Paula.



I'm not sure that you'll be able to convince him to change his mind. Do the two of you have anal sex? That might be a good place to start if not. Also, you could try touching his anus during foreplay or oral.


The articles, How Do I Give my guy Anal Pleasure? and Find His Secret Hot Spots, might give you some information to share with him, or things to try.



You might want to check on the Let's Talk Toys board for advice on what type of strap-ons people enjoy. You can do a search there and find prior posts, or you might want to try asking your question there.

Good luck with your quest .... keep us posted on how it's going.




iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2005
Sun, 09-21-2008 - 6:20am

***Has anyone ever done this before? I want my husband to try this, I find it very exciting, the thought of being in charge and dominant, but he is not as comfortable with it. He believe it's an exit only kind of deal. Is there any good reasons I can get him to think about trying this and what is a good strap on to use for both our pleasures? ***

Once he experiences anal play he will love it. DW always uses a vibrating anal toy to massage my prostate while she gives me a BJ. Really intensifies my orgasms. Vibrating anal toys work better than fingers. Toys we use are Spectragels Vibrating Anal Tool, Anal T, Anal E-Z Bend and Vibrating Anal Twister Strap On. The last toy can be used either as an anal toy or as a strap on. We tried non vibrating anal beads, but they did not do much for us. Remember use lots of lube. All these toys are small and insert easily with lube. We like Astroglide.

At one time I had a hangup about this type of anal play, but as I came to understand my prostate I purchased a vibrating anal toy and asked DW to use it while she gave me a BJ and WOW what an orgasm-I was hooked.

We graduated from this type of anal play to strap ons. We have three strap ons. Vibrating Anal Twister Strap On and Feeldoe and our favorite Bend Over Beginner Kit.

The Bend Over Beginner Kit has a harness, two silicone dildos and a vibrator that fits in the harness for stimulating her clitoris while she does me. She gives me a HJ while she does me. We usually cum together. She gets so excited and talks dirty about what she is doing to me. These dildos are small and easy to insert with lube. Remember use lots of Astroglide. Also double dildos look interesting.

The Feeldoe is a strapless strap on. It is designed to insert in me while the bulb end fits in her vagina. Lots of people love it. it feels good in me, but the other end is a little hard to keep in her vagina.

You might want to try the DVD Bend Over Boyfriend. Watching it together might get him interested.

Once he gets over his hangup he will love it. Guys who don't do anal play don't know what they are missing.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-17-2007
Tue, 09-30-2008 - 7:54pm

Hello Paula!

I also enjoy using a strap on with my men, however, like the others have suggested, you should probably start off small and work your way up to it. If he is of the mindset that it is "exit only," then suggesting a strap on right off the bat is probably not the best place to start. I would suggest doing some research together about prostate massage and anal play, then work in the fingers, the toys and eventually a strap on. However, some men, even those that love anal play, are opposed to the idea. Just remember that we each have our own boundaries and not all of them want them to be crossed.

Good luck and I hope to hear an update!

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-16-2006
Tue, 09-30-2008 - 8:06pm

Yes I have with my first wife, I was not so sure about it either, however after the first time or two it turned into a lot of fun for me also, and I will confess, I never have O'd so hard as with that. Lots of communication and start small at first and work up to it.




Edited 9/30/2008 8:08 pm ET by bronco2006
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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-09-2006
Fri, 10-10-2008 - 10:42am
Please follow Issytish's advice. It's very good, along with other bits of advice you've been given. I could never get my husband to do anything kinky much less letting me put anything into his bottom, so don't get unnerved. Since my divorce, I've done this quite a lot. My partners and myself really want it to be clean, so there's the process of cleaning them out, which I only recently learned how to do. But that, too, can be fun. Otherwise, it's very exciting. The way they look at me when I'm wearing my dildo and harness...!
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