What if he's into Internet Porn?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2007
What if he's into Internet Porn?
14
Tue, 09-30-2008 - 5:02pm
Tracey Cox has a new iVillage article! In her article, Addicted to Internet Porn: When he'd rather surf porn sites than have sex with you, is a great read. So often, when guys are watching porn, women are feeling cheated, but that's certainly not his intention. Check the article out and see if it's likely to cause a problem in your relationship.




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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2005
Wed, 10-01-2008 - 8:13pm
For the record I'll mention that for a number of guys (what
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-28-2006
Wed, 10-01-2008 - 8:23pm
Because the reactions of actresses in porn flicks are so authentic and true to life.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2005
Wed, 10-01-2008 - 9:08pm
Ah, but it may not matter that much of it is faked, for all that matters is what he thinks.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2007
Wed, 10-01-2008 - 9:42pm

Hey -- thanks for sharing that! Just another thing to add to the list so that women don't have to feel insecure when their guy watches porn!

(I don't really get it though. I've never met such a man ... and I certainly don't watch porn myself to compare myself to the women in it -- or to look for the size of a penis. It's a "whole" event thing for me.)





iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2007
Wed, 10-01-2008 - 9:45pm

One thing I don't understand ... while you're being studious about porn, what is it that you're getting out of it?

I watch porn to get turned on or to facilitate a fantasy. If I was so busy paying attention to the size of a penis or any one such feature, I'd loose track of what my purpose was. So, I guess my real question is, have you ever watched porn just for the benefit of getting off?





iVillage Member
Registered: 02-28-2006
Wed, 10-01-2008 - 9:50pm
I can so relate to that, Misty. I have a hard time watching bondage porn, even though it's something I'm really into in my personal life, because I tend to get lost in the technical details of the ropework and it loses some of its eroticism for me.


iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2005
Thu, 10-02-2008 - 1:26am

What am I getting out of it by studying? I'm getting data pertaining to the does size matter topic, in all it's various branches of debate.


Have I ever watched it to get off? Nope. Just kidding. I'm not a robot, so of course I have. :)


I believe that what most people probably enjoy watching I find sort of boring.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-18-2008
Thu, 10-02-2008 - 6:28am

I thought this was a really good article. I know dh looks at porn and I know it "readies" him sometimes, it does for me as well. We have talked about what it is that we like to see and try to incorporate some aspects of that in our sex lives (for example mirrors to allow us to see aspects in action).


I did chuckle at the walking around naked in heels accidentally and the stop-asking start initiating. Both I have done and it does work to get his attention.


I can add to the list of suggestions, make some porn of YOU-pictures or videos to let him focus on YOUR image when he wants his alone time-it just

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2007
Thu, 10-02-2008 - 7:38am

Another thing you might want to consider when you're watching scenes like orgy's is that it might not be so much the size getting the reactions you are looking for. I know that even being with the same partner can produce different reactions, different amounts of time in my reaction. It can have a lot to do with my own horniness level, how long it's been since we had sex, what I'm fantasizing about, how long we've been at it at so on.

I know that the more I want him inside of me, the more I'll react as he enters me. There are also times that I'm caught up in everything, not particularly focused on any one thing, and then something will occur -- like he'll start stroking my g-spot, and it will just send me to a new place. I could probably go on with a list here, but my point is, it's not size that makes either of these get a reaction.

I don't think Beyonce coined the phrase, "make it hurt so good" it's been around for a very long time, my first memories of the term came from a John Mellencamp song. While a larger penis might give you that feeling quicker (and not always so pleasantly), it's certainly a feeling you can have without a larger penis involved. I know that if my DH were "larger", we wouldn't be able to have sex nearly as often. I rather enjoy it taking a little longer and involving a little more variety when getting to that point too. Often, with a larger penis, the pleasure is very little in comparison to the pain. In either circumstance, knowing how to use what you have is far more pleasurable than size itself.

Then's there's always the "acting" factor in porn. Suppose that industry wants to satisfy the audience who does have a size desire, do you think that would play into the scene at all? Maybe they are even trying to make people think that size does matter. Afterall, if they get enough people fantasizing about it, given the odds of larger penises actually existing on potential partners, it would certainly help the porn industry meet their financial goals.

Most of us realize that most of what we see in porn isn't 'real'. I think that is an important factor, especially for those women (and I guess some men) who are feeling insecure about their SO watching porn. It's not a reflection of reality.





iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2007
Thu, 10-02-2008 - 7:45am
Great point about making your own porn, Liv. I know that it would be really awesome to be able to connect all of those feelings and memories to the clip.




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