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| Mon, 04-04-2005 - 5:10pm |
i've been going out with my boyfriend for 6 monthes and his mom is so rude to me in school. shes always making faces at me and when i talk to him on the phone she makes up excuses to get off the phone...she did it the other night at 1 in the morning saying she was expecting a phone call. i recently talked to his brothers ex and she said thats how their mom was to her too. what should i say to him to make her stop because im so uncomfortable anymore. i dont even eat please help me. what should i say to him. thanks everyone

First, just wondering how old you are.
Second....it's HIM that needs to put his foot down regarding his mother. If he allows this to go on, and isn't willing to somehow work with you on things, then you're going to have to decide if you can deal with this.
Unfortunately, many times, parents can get in the way, and sometimes, that prevents their child from having a normal healthy r'ship. And unfortunately, you're the one who may have to decide if you have to leave or not.
Also, if he lives with his mother and is on the phone at 1am, maybe you can compromise by not being on the phone so late at night...regardless of her reasons. As for her dirty looks, I would let your guy know this is how she's treating you, and if to him, it's acceptable for her to treat you, his gf, like that. If he feels it is, then you have a big decision to make....basically if you're willing to be with someone that is going to allow their mother to treat their gf's like crap.....or not.
Let me get this straight...his mother, a grown woman is making faces at you?! Oh wow, someone needs to grow up!
Honey, she's jealous of the women in her sons' lives. She's afraid that their girlfriends will replace her as the nuber one female in their world. Really there is little you can do to change her, but have a talk with your boyfriend. Tell him what his mother does to you, how it makes you feel, and ask him to stand up to her for you. It's best if he has a talk with her. If you try to approach her about her behavior, she will only become defensive and more unfriendly toward you. In the meantime - kill her with kindness. Regardless of what she does to you, always be nice to her. Eventually she'll feel stupid for always being so mean to someone who is always so nice to her, and other people won't be able to take her side. They'll say, "But coffeefrk25 always seems so sweet! Why don't you like her or why are you so mean to her?"
Beware...if your boyfriend defends his mother and cannot see that she is treating you poorly, it's best to walk away. Otherwise you will be spending time with a Momma's Boy who values his mother's obsessive opinions over yours.
Good luck!
How old is this guy. I'm just curious.
Also, if you're in HS, yeah, I'd cut back WAY back on the late night phone calls. My folks woulda killed me if they knew I was on the phone that late.
And I would see how he reacts to you telling him about the faces his mother makes. I wonder if she works at the school to keep an eye on her boys. and the "troublemaking women".
Hugs. Good luck.