He kissed my friend!!
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He kissed my friend!!
| Tue, 04-05-2005 - 12:23pm |
Ok sorry but this is long.. so I have been seeing my guy friend for about six months now. I have known him for about 7 or so years and he always liked me and always told me and all my friends that but i never felt the same way until recently when we started going out. He always said that everytime he would be with another girl he would always want to be with me and that now hes with me he says is the happiest hes ever been. Well I reaaaaallllllly like him too and we have alot in commoon ands have the best time when we hang out but when we first started going out maybe 2 or 3 months in he had hooked up with my ex best friend. I still talk to her but were not that close since we all hang out together (we grew up together)He never told me i had found out through an anonymous e-mail and whe i confronted him he lied then called back 5 mins later and told me the truth. He said he was really drunk and that he would never do it again and doesnt even know why he did it when he did Well surprise surprise I cant stop thinking about it after 4 or 5 months. when we are all out together and were all a little tipsy he starts dancing with her and EVERYONE in that case but most of his attention is focused on her or so it seems to me. I feel like a know for a fact that if i wasnt there again while he was hanging out in a group with her that this would happen again. I also know that he wouldnt tell me either.I dont wanna waste my time but i really like him and i know he likes me but i feel like he'll just do it again like he cant resist or something and everytime i ask him about it he's like it will never happen again etc. but he acts like it will. What do i do? I feel like i have tried confronting the situation but i still just cant believe him or trust him. I dont wanna be without him but it eats me up ALL the TIME. Please give me Advice on how to handle this or should i even be with him?? WHAT DO I DO????

I'm not going to tell you that I think you should dump him, but I do think you need to be careful. Obviously you don't trust him, and he's given you a good reason not to trust him...he hooked up with your friend and then lied about it. Without trust, a relationship is almost certainly doomed and can be a miserable place to be. You deserve more than that!
I would sit him down and explain to him exactly how his hooking up with your friend and the lying hurt you, and explain how his behavior around your friend makes you uneasy because of the past. If he cares about you and is serious about not allowing it to happen again, he will stop the behavior that is upsetting you.
And what about your friend? I assume that she knows you are seeing this guy now. If she was a decent person, she'd tell him to stop flirting with her now that he's with you because you are her friend.
I wish you luck, but protect your feelings just in case history repeats itself! (((HUGS)))