I Hate my Ex-Husband
Find a Conversation
| Mon, 04-11-2005 - 10:48am |
I have to vent. I am so mad I'm about to explode. My ex-husband is one of the most hateful, nasty human beings that ever breathed. He was hateful and nasty when I was married to him, and neither divorce nor age has mellowed him.
I have signed up to re-finance my house. This was the house he and I had when we divorced. He was given 40% of it, and I was granted 60%. His name is still on the title. The house needs some serious work - outside and inside paint, carpet, etc. because it hasn't had any major work done on it in a long time. I haven't had the money, so I figured a refinance with a cash out would be a good way to pay for these things. The title company called me this morning and said the son of a b**** is refusing to sign the paperwork. I was supposed to close on the loan tomorrow. That b******!! There is no reason for him not to sign. It is costing him nothing. He's just being hateful--- again.
This is the same man who has not seen his son, his only child, in 6 years. Not even when I called and said "your son has a drug problem. He's been arrested. He needs you" did he involve himself. He said "it's YOUR problem. You take care of it." How's that for a father???
Now I'm concerned that he's considering trying to force me to sell the house so he can have his 40%. That would mean I either buy out his part or I have to move. The house is in no shape to sell. He and I would both lose money if he does this.
Why are some people just maliciously hateful? How can they get up and look at themselves in the mirror every morning? Do they really believe they have a God-given right to hurt other people and make their lives difficult?
I don't use the word hate lightly, but in his case I truly hate him. I hate him for all the years he made me miserable. I hate him for physically and emotionally abandoning his son. I hate him for being the selfish, self-centered, nasty human being that he is.
I'm sorry. I just hate to get that out. Sometimes I just want to kick myself in the head for all the years I wasted with that man. I literally could write a book about him "World's Most Hateful Person" but I'm trying hard to get all remnants of him out of my life. The house is really the only link I have left with him. He can't even be cooperative about that.
Please send hugs to calm me down. Advice would be helpful, too. Thanks


BIG HUGS TO YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My only adivce, if you can, buy him out and get his name off the paperwork. Also, if you're doing a refi, can you not get the loan on your own? I would assume, even though his name is on the title, that doesn't mean you can't "own" the loan.
Hugs. I feel for you. My xh let me have everything, but afterwards wanted things back, and also gave me hell of a time for things I TRULY needed. He was a total ass after our marriage ended.
Stay strong.
ETA: I also meant to say, if he starts to make your life miserable, and if you can get a loan on your own, I would start to think about selling the house and just getting out of the JOINT title wiht your xh. Even if it means selling it as turnkey and losing a lot.
Hey, as in the movie The First Wives Club, sell it for a dollar, and give him his $0.40. lol.
Edited 4/11/2005 12:17 pm ET ET by cherbear017
Oh...dd, big hugs to you.
Steffy
CO-cl of Is It Meant to Be?